In Our Corner: To Protect & Serve: Do Black Lives Really Matter?

Ta’Kiya Young & her unborn child killed by Police in an Ohio Parking Lot 08.24.2023:

“Out of the car,” the officer said multiple times.

“For what? Young asks.

“They said you stole stuff.  Do not leave,” he responds.

A second officer then stands in front of Young’s car, puts his hand on the hood, and eventually points his gun at her through the front windshield.

“I didn’t steal s—,” Young says.

“Then get out,” the first officer says.

The officer standing in front of the Young’s car is then seen pointing his gun towards her.

“Get out of the f—ing car,” the second officer says.

“No.” Young is heard saying, followed by, “You gonna shoot me?”

“Get out of the car,” the first officer responds while banging on Young’s window with one hand and grabbing the slightly opened window with the other.

Seconds later, Young is seen turning her steering wheel and driving off.  A sound is heard as the officer in front of the car fires into the windshield at close range and moves to the driver’s side.

In a statement [Chief] Belford, (Blendon Township) said Young drove her car directly into one of the officers and he “fired a single shot through the windshield,” which led to her death.  According to Belford, the officer is a victim of attempted vehicular assault.

(Regarding the other officer), Young also drove away with the other officer’s arm in the driver’s side window, making him a victim of misdemeanor assault, Belford said.

Because Young is dead, charges can’t be filed, but the crime victim status of both officers remain, Belford said.

“This is a tragedy.” Belford said. “Ms. Young’s family is understandingly very upset and grieving.  While none of us can fully understand the depths of her pain, all of us can keep her family in our prayers and give them the time and space to deal with this heartbreaking turn of events.”

– Mirna Alsharif NBC News

My Dear Readers,

I am writing in response to the police involved shooting death of Ta’Kiya Young. I am filled with intense sadness not only because of the tragedy of her needless death, but also the loss of her unborn child. This shooting, the latest in the ongoing psychological intrusions that continue to strike at the heart of the African American community, is akin to a tsunami. 

Tsunamis are giant waves caused by undersea earthquakes or volcanic eruptions. There are no identifiable means/ways to predict where, when or how destructive the next tsunami will be. However, while tsunamis cannot be prevented, there are things that can be done before, during, and after a tsunami that could save lives.

While deaths, injuries, and psychological trauma from natural occurrences like earthquakes or volcanic eruptions and the very unnatural deaths of African Americans by the intentional actions of police are both tragic and heart wrenching, they share another heartbreaking similarity: there is no identifiable means/ways to predict where, when or how destructive the next police shooting will be.

The Numbers Speak Truth: Consistency in the Killing of African Americans

There has been a consistent history of police involved shootings of African Americans.  Various research studies have reached the following conclusions:

• Black people, who account for 13% of the US population, account for 27 % of those fatality shot and killed by police in 2021. That means that Black people are twice likely as White people to be shot and killed by police officers.
• Another study over a 40-year period (1980-2019) found that Black Americans were estimated to be 3.5 times more likely to die from police violence than White Americans.
• A study conducted by Harvard School of Public Health found that Black Americans are 3.23 times more likely than White Americans to be killed by police.  The researchers examined 5,494 police related deaths in the US between 2013 and 2017.
• Police violence is a leading cause of death for young Black men in the United States.  Over the life course, about 1 in every 1,000 Black men can be expected to be killed by police. Risk of being killed by the police peaks between the ages of 20 and 35 for men and women for all racial and ethnic groups.
• Racial disparities in killing by police varied widely across the country, with some metropolitan areas showing high differences between treatment by race.  Black Chicagoans, for example were found to be over 650 % more likely to be killed by police than White Chicagoans.

The Tsunamis Comparison: Saving Lives: During & After Interaction with Police

As stated earlier, there are no identifiable ways/means to predict where, when or how destructive the next police shooting will be.  In relations to daily interactions with police using police powers in enforcing the law, Black people as individuals have the power to take actions that could save lives and reduce the psychological distress of the interaction that may follow. Such empowerment can come in the following two phase:

1. During the Police Stop
2. After the Police Stop

1. During the Police Stop

Understand …the police have the legal authority to stop, question and detain.  Keep your hands in open sight.  Keep your hands away from your body.

• Comply… Comply… Comply…with all police directives. Never leave the police stop without consent of the police.  By leaving without consent you are placing you and your passengers in danger of death, or physical injury.
• Be observant. Take quiet notice of the police officer’s badge, vehicle identification number, the policing agency (city, county, or state), the time of the police stop, address and other key information such as possible witnesses or traffic cameras.

2. After the Police Stop

“Do not seek to resolve the issue with the Police in the street.  You will lose.  The system is designed for you… to lose.”

• First, understand you have succeeded in stepping away alive, unharmed, and now you can return home…safe.
• Be observant of the officer’s mannerisms, use of language (profanity) the way the police stop was carried out. Take note of any actions by the police officer that created discomfort (placing his hand on or drawing his firearm).
• If you feel you have been wronged, file a formal complaint with the police agency’s Accountability Department. The complaint is now documented and will trigger the opening of a formal review of the situation and will become a permanent record in the police officer’s personnel file that will follow the officer throughout active policing to retirement.

Concluding Words

My Dear Readers,

A few weeks ago, in the blog entitled, “In Our Corner: Learning to Live with Fear not In Fear.”  I referenced the fear that African Americans feel when they or their loved ones interact with the police. They live every day, holding their breath…awaiting the next police shooting.  And now, we mourn the tragic police shooting death of Ta’Kiya Young and her unborn child. In reviewing the statements of Police Chief Belford as quoted in the beginning of the blog, there is a tapdancing around and intent to not only blame Ms. Young for their deaths but also to cite the two officers as “crime victims”.

The deaths of Ta’Kiya Young and her unborn child were preventable. Ms. Young sought to resolve the issue with the Police in the streets by driving away and in doing so failed to comply with their commands and directives. The police in their response, seeking compliance, utilized profanity, power and control techniques as well as actions placing their own lives at risk of immediate harm, specifically one officer standing directly in front of the vehicle and the other officer reaching into the vehicle grabbing the steering wheel.

So, the outcome of situations in which the police interact with African Americans under the concepts of “enforcing the law”, directly results in the deaths of a black woman and her unborn child where the only crime was shoplifting a bottle of liquor. So again, the questions remain… To Protect & Serve: Do Black Lives Really Matter?

Looking at the realness of Blackness…  As we continue to hold our breaths awaiting the next police involved shooting of a man, woman, child etc., listen to your own thoughts and feelings…. Answer the question and be with your own truths.

Until the next time… Remaining… In Our Corner

In Our Corner: Learning to Live With Fear not In Fear

“He already has two strikes against him. He is black and he’s a man.  I don’t want him to get that third strike.”

–        Anonymous Mother of 14-year-old boy.

“I am so terrified.  I know I can’t protect my son while he is out on the streets.  I am afraid the police will take him… He is a good person… a college graduate…has a good job… but all they see is the color of his skin.”

–        Anonymous Mother of 28-year-old son.

“When I kiss my husband goodbye, I tell him that I love him.  I ask God to protect him and bring him home safely from work. When I hear police sirens, I can’t breathe, I can’t think.  I am in hell. I can’t do this anymore!”

–        Anonymous Spouse married 10 years.

My Dear Readers,

Once again, I find myself reaching out to you. I am not a prolific blog poster.  I am extremely busy with my clinical practice.  And yet in the last two blog postings, I find myself pressed to resume writing again.

In a recent post, one of my colleagues chastised me for my written views when I compared Jim Crow of the 1940’s to the lived experiences of African Americans in 2023.  James Genovese, LPC, stated:

“While it is naïve to believe that all vestiges of racism and economic oppression have been eliminated, it is equally naïve to think that we are the same Jim Crow society of the 1940.’s.” (LinkedIn 06.07.23)

Recently an article in the Associated Press (AP) reported six White former Mississippi police officers pleaded guilty to state charges for torturing, sexually and physically assaulting two Black men.  The AP story goes on to state that the six police officers entered the home without a warrant, handcuffed and assaulted the two men with tasers, sex toys, and other objects.

The news story added:

“In the gruesome crimes committed by men tasked with enforcing the law, federal prosecutors saw echoes of Mississippi’s dark history, including the 1964 killing of three civil rights workers after a deputy handed them off to the Klu Klux Klan… Prosecutors say some of the officers nicknamed themselves the “Goon Squad” because of their willingness to use excessive force and cover up attacks including the assault that ended with a deputy shooting one of the victims in the mouth.”

–        Goldberg, Michael. “Six Former Mississippi Officers Plead Guilty to State Charges for Torturing Two Black Men.” Associated Press. 08.14.2023.

Repeated actions by the police that resulted in psychological impacts and traumas of previous generations are now being passed down to present and future generations. The result is these new generations “living in fear” as indicated by the three quotes at the beginning of this blog.

The common theme of the three quotes brings to mind the Greek myth, Sisyphus. He is cursed to roll an immense boulder up a hill only for it to roll back down each time it neared the top for eternity.  Sisyphus’ rock represents mankind’s absurd dilemma, which is ultimately impossible to resolve—that mankind longs for reason and meaning in the world, but the world refuses to answer that longing. Hence, African Americans understanding the repetitive years of the dilemma of policing in their community longingly sought to have White Americans take notice and bring resolution, only to have been met with silence and failure with the result of continuing to “roll the rock up the hill”.

In my clinical practice, focusing on traumatology, a result of trauma can be one being reduced to a state of existing or surviving in the “Pit of Despair”. Therefore, after being subjected to the traumatic assault, the insult, intrusion, or incident, a permanent psychological wound develops, meaning, the traumatic experience never ever goes away. The problem may lie in the fear associated with the trauma or a similar trauma repeating itself or the inability to control the illumination of the new or reoccurring traumatic experience.  So, the person begins “Living in Fear” of the next impending traumatic experience. 

A clinical methodology of treating individuals responding to traumatic impacts is to assist individuals through the following:

• Clinical understanding of the permeance of trauma – trauma never, ever goes away.
• Teach skills in balancing the burden of traumatic impacts allowing the weight of such burden to become lighter.
• Provide a clinical methodology to transform the experience from existing and surviving the trauma impacts – Living in Fear, to growth and empowerment following trauma impacts – Living with Fear.

Transformation: From “Living in Fear” to “Living with Fear”.

The concept of Living in Fear is one where the individual during and following the traumatic incident is overwhelmed, drowning… driven to states of hopelessness, helplessness, and powerlessness.  It is the individual’s finality to control feelings, thoughts and the external spaces surrounding one’s immediate environment. 

The concept of Living with Fear is one where the traumatized individual, during and following the traumatic incident can achieve advocacy for self, balance with one’s emotions and calmness within one’s external environment. 

Movement of the negative F.E.A.R. (states of existing & surviving)

• False – what is occurring is meant to deceive.
• Expectations – strong belief that something will happen.
• Assumptions – accepted as true or certain to happen.
• Real – actually existing or occurring as fact.

Transformation to the positive F.E.A.R. (states of growth & empowerment)

• Facing – confronting, dealing, and accepting a difficult fact or situation.
• Embracing – accepting and supporting a belief or change willingly and enthusiastically.
• Acknowledging – accepting and admitting the truth or the validity of a position.
• Responding – advocating, returning, and normalizing; preparing for fullness in the state of transforming.

Concluding Words

“I am invisible, simply because people refuse to see me.”

–        Ralph Ellison, Author. “The Invisible Man” (1952).

My Dear Readers,

My experiences during my 70 years of living in Jim Crow America, have shown that regardless of my accolades, accomplishments, and achievements (and there are many), as stated by Ralph Ellison, “I am invisible simply because people refused to see me”. One individual, my esteemed colleague and PTSD psychotherapist James Genovese LPC, rather than seek to question the differences to his strongly held beliefs, he decided to hold on to an illusion and regretfully expose himself as not credible in his self-designation as an expert in PTSD.  I would encourage him and any other colleagues seeking to understand the realities of Jim Crow in today’s era review the following readings:

• “The New Jim Crow: Mass Incarceration in the Age of Colorblindness” by Michelle Alexander (2010)
• “Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome” by Dr. Joy DeGruy, Ph.D.

“Our hope is we can put this unfortunate case of “wrong place, wrong time” behind us and continue to represent the community that we serve.”

–        Statement by Lansing Police Department (08.13.23) following a police officer unholstering his weapon, detaining, and handcuffing 12-year-old black boy who the police “misidentified as an adult suspected of car thefts. The 12-year-old boy was in the process of taking out the trash to the dumpster when accustomed by the police.

In closing, it is apparently clear that when it comes to psychological incidents and traumatic intrusions created by today’s policing under the cover of “representing the community that we serve” will continue.  The African American community continues to be caught in a dilemma similar to Sisyphus who is forced to roll a rock up the hill for eternity.  Until assistance is given to stop the psychological intrusions, African Americans can mitigate the psychological impacts by learning methods that will empower themselves to live with the fear rather than live in fear.

The problem of transforming policing lies with those holding the illusion of Whiteness. The silence is loud and noticeable.  As James Baldwin stated:

“They (White people) have had the belief for many years, and for innumerable reasons that black men are inferior to white men.  Many of them, indeed, know better, but, as you will discover, people find it difficult to act on what they know.  To act is to be committed, and to be committed is to be in danger.  In this case, the danger is in the minds of most white Americans is the loss of their identity.”

–        James Baldwin Author. “The Fire Next Time”, (1963).

Until the next time…

Remaining … In Our Corner.

In Our Corner: Balancing in America: The Illusion of Whiteness and Realness of Blackness

“Our hope is we can put this unfortunate case of ‘wrong place, wrong time’ behind us and continue to represent the community that we serve.”

–        Statement by Lansing Police Department (08.13.23) following a police officer unholstering his weapon, detaining, and handcuffing 12-year-old black boy who the police misidentified as an adult suspected of car thefts. The 12-year-old boy was in the process of taking out the trash to the dumpster when accosted by the police.

My Dear Readers,

Recently, I received a strong rebuke from a mental health colleague, suggesting I was being naïve in comparing Jim Crow of the 1940’s to the present days of 2023. The colleague John Genovese psychotherapist wrote:

“America has a bitter history of oppressing persons of African, First Nations, Hispanic, Asian, and Southern European heritage. We are also a nation that continues to evolve, sometimes in [the] wrong directions and many times on the right path. That we have legal protections of speech and free assembly [and] a Constitution that is adaptable and expandable are examples of this right path. It is the means by which slavery was abolished and formerly disenfranchised citizens were eventually granted voting, employment, and housing rights. While it is naïve to believe that all vestiges of racism and economic oppression have been eliminated, it is equally naïve to think that we are the same Jim Crow society of the 1940’s. No, America is not a disgrace. It is, as [with] all human endeavors, imperfect. It is a work in progress. And what we need right now is unity, not division.”

Several months ago, while traveling in Eastern Europe, I wrote a series of blogs in which I examined James Baldwin’s worldly acclaimed book, The Fire Next Time, 1963.  In his book, Baldwin focused on the life experiences for Negroes in 1963, contrasting their lives with the Colored population during the Jim Crow era of the 1940’s. 

In my six-segment blog, “The Perilous Journey”, I sought to understand and compare the differences in the treatment of the Coloreds of the 1940’s, the Negros of the 1960’s, and the African Americans of today and realized that Jim Crow was alive and doing very well in 2023.

In my most recent blog posting In Our Corner: Growing Up Black and Male, Wrong Place, Wrong Time, which focused on the racial profiling and misidentification of a 12-year-old black boy. He was in the process of taking out the trash and was accosted by the police with drawn firearms, handcuffed, and detained, traumatizing the child in the process. 

I spoke of The Illusion of Whiteness & The Realness of Blackness and the understanding that both groups reside on the same planet, are citizens in the same country, and yet reside in two separate consciousness.

Illusion of Whiteness

There is an illusion of whiteness in America.  An illusion is something that deceives by producing a false or misleading impression of reality. There is an illusion that black people enjoyed the same rights of free speech and the right of assembly.  There is the false and misleading impression of disenfranchised citizens eventually being granted voting, employment, and housing rights, there is the illusion that “America is in progress”.

Realness of Blackness

There is a realness of blackness in America.  Realness is described as the fact or quality of being real, reality, truth.  There is the realness that black people in America are responding to 403 years of racism, discrimination, and oppression. There is a realness that black people understand. That white people live in fear of black people, particularly black males, that results in profiling and targeting of these individuals. This reality of black people results in psychological distress, hyperawareness, and tension as the community becomes strained and overwhelmed while they seek to protect their children, in particular, males.

There is the realness of blackness when white fear causes the restriction of blacks from access to voting, employment, and housing. There is the realness of blackness that white America abolished one form of slavery only to create another in the form of incarceration. Particularly of black males. This act has similar psychological impacts on children and families as seen in slavery times when parents were forcibly separated from their children. Finally, in returning to the “understanding that both groups reside on the same planet, are citizens in the same country and yet reside in two separate consciousnesses”,there is a polarizing difference in how both communities view the police.  The illusion of whiteness is the desire to view the police as “protectors” acting in the supportive role of community policing.  This directly opposes the experience of the realness of blackness. The history of policing began as slave patrols. These slave patrols utilized racial profiling and misidentification against black males. These similar tactics and actions today by the police serve to create psychological distress reinforcing the inability to protect oneself or one’s children.  

Concluding Words

“While it is naïve to believe that all vestiges of racism and economic oppression have been eliminated, it is equally naïve to think that we are the same Jim Crow society of the 1940.’s.”

–        John Genovese, LPC Psychotherapist.

This quote affirms the illusions of whiteness in America which is in direct opposition of the realness and the experiences of Blackness in America.  This quote is disturbing as it is being made by a mental health professional specializing in PTSD treatment.  It provides worthy concern that black people seeking mental health treatment interview prospective therapists questioning not only their experiences working with members of the African American community but also their belief systems and the foundations of their personally held views.

There is a realness in the blackness of America of balancing the illusions held by others and holding one’s breath, awaiting the next shocking media development or announcement psychologically impacting and traumatizing a hyperaware and hypersensitive community.  Yes, as indicated in the statement by John Genovese the psychotherapist, there are “legal protections of speech and free assembly, a Constitution that is adaptable and expandable”. However, the Fourth Amendment’s guarantee of “protection from unreasonable searches and seizures by the government” means very little, when a Black parent lives in fear of sending one’s male child out to do a simple household task; the fear that the child will be misidentified and killed by the police.

 The First Amendment’s guarantee of the “right of the people peacefully to assemble” means very little when a Black parent lives with the fear that their child will be racially profiled by the police.  Such awareness must be communicated to the child to keep them safe if they are detained by the police.  

Lastly, the First Amendment’s guarantee of the right to “petition the government for a redress of grievances” means very little, following repeated attempts by the black community through its leaders and parents to the government to address the concerns of racial profiling and misidentification of black males.  With the resulting grievances and responses being silence or apologies such as the recent incident where the 12-year-old was handcuffed and detained while taking out the trash, police chief stated,

“As the chief of police, I want to apologize that this incident has such an effect on this young man and his family.”

–        Police Chief Soebee, Lansing Police Department

Noted in the apology is the repeated misidentification of the 12-year-old boy as a “young man”. Clearly as this misidentification is coming from the leadership of the policing authority, the same message of misidentification is being communicated and reinforced to those working under his leadership.  The resulting view of realness in blackness, our children, particularly our males remain at risk from those who seek to “enforce the law” under the cover of “community policing.”

The realness of blackness as to the perception of helplessness in protecting our children particularly males extends in other domains as well. Recently, a black adolescent in Jefferson Parrish School District, LA was psychologically traumatized while attending a classroom viewing when a virtual screening of a brown stick figure hanging from a noose with a racial slur (ni**er) with his name attached. (08.12.23)

The response from the Jefferson School District?  An apology.

In closing, I want to respond to my colleague’s illusions of whiteness in his closing quote, Mr. Genovese stated:

“No, America is not a disgrace. It is, as all human endeavors, imperfect. It is a work in progress. And what we need right now is unity, not division.”

I recently saw the following quote in a LinkedIn posting:

“I want them to have everything that I have.  I want God to bless them as much as he blesses me, but Pastor, I just can’t be in the same room with them.  It just bothers me.”

– Uncredited

The truthfulness and honesty of this statement affirms the illusion to pretend that America is not a disgrace.  In the realness of black people, America has been a “work in progress” for 403 years.  What we have is division and as long as whiteness resides in a state of illusion, such illusion will prevent unity and continue to result in division.

In recalling the words of James Baldwin:

“The really terrible thing, old buddy, is that you must accept them.  And I mean that very seriously.  You must accept them with love.  For these innocent people have no other hope.  They are, in effect, still trapped in a history which they do not understand, and until they understand it, they cannot be released from it.  They have had to believe for many years that black men are inferior to white men.’

–        James Baldwin Author, The Fire Next Time (1963)

Until the next time…

Remaining … In Our Corner.

In Our Corner: Growing Up Black and Male in America-“Wrong Place Wrong Time”.

“Our hope is we can put this unfortunate case of “wrong place, wrong time” behind us and continue to represent the community that we serve.”

–        Lansing Police Department (08.13.23) following a police officer unholstering his weapon, detaining, and handcuffing a 12-year-old black boy who the police misidentified as an adult suspected of car thefts. The 12-year-old boy was in the process of taking trash to the dumpster when accosted by the police.

“Upon review… the police chief concluded ‘the officer was respectful and professional during the child’s temporary detention’. Nevertheless, he stated ‘We understand that something like this has an impact on all parties involved.  As the chief of police, I want to apologize that this incident has such an effect on this young man and his family.”

–        Police Chief Soebee, Lansing Police Department

“They traumatized my son. Tashawn is traumatized so much that he doesn’t want to go outside anymore.”

–        Michael Bernard, father of 12-year-old who was detained and handcuffed by Lansing Police.

“Too often, Black bodies are harmed while law enforcement hides behind the phase “they fit the description.” While law enforcement calls it an “unfortunate misunderstanding,” they don’t know what kind of harm they have done to the psyche of this child, this family or the community.”

–        Whitney Alesse, Social Justice Advocate

“The family is exploring all legal options including the possibility of filing a lawsuit”, the lawyers said.”

–        Guardian Staff Writers (08.13.23)

My Dear Readers,

Recently in Lansing, MI a young 12-year-old Black boy just taking out the trash was accosted by police, held at gunpoint, handcuffed, and paraded through the parking lot while being detained and questioned regarding recent car thefts occurring in the area.  It was only after the father realized that his son had been gone for an extended period of time that he came out to see him surrounded by police officers and vehicles. 

The child was detained until it was determined that the 12-year-old boy, other than being Black, did not fit the description of the adult male suspect. At that point he was released, returned to the custody of his father and “apologies” extended for the “misidentification.”

The Illusion of Whiteness in Contemplation of Police Involvement

“No harm done…right?”  “Simple mistake, right?”  “Could have happened to anyone, right?”  “A simple misidentification, right?”  “The police were just doing their jobs, right?”  “The police have difficult jobs to do, right?”  “So, they are going to make a mistake now and then, right?” “Got to give them some room to maneuver, right?”  “The boy didn’t get hurt, right?”  “It’s not like the boy was shot or physically hurt, right?”  “He’ll be over it in a few days…hanging out with his friends…laughing like kids do, right?” “His father probably overreacted and that’s understandable, right?”  “Besides, they are going to file a lawsuit and make some money from this. Right?” “It’s going blow over, right?  I mean… it’ all going to be, okay? Right?

Wrong…very wrong indeed.  It is not going to blow over.  And it will never ever be okay. 

The Realness of Blackness in Contemplation of Police Involvement

Suspicious behaviors: Racial profiling…driving while black…walking while black…shopping while black…riding a bicycle while black…being in the wrong location while black… and now taking out the trash…while black.

“Are you okay?”  “Are you safe? Did they hurt you?”  “Is my boy alive?”

“Our hope is we can put this unfortunate case of ‘wrong place, wrong time’ behind us and continue to represent the community that we serve.”

The Illusion of Whiteness

This is simply an unfortunate case of the 12-year-old being in the wrong place at the wrong time.  An unfortunate mistake was made, so let’s put this behind us, move on and let us continue to represent the community that we serve.

The Realness of Blackness

This is another example in which a Black boy was racially profiled by the police.  He was accosted, detained, and handcuffed while performing the simple chore of taking out the trash. An unfortunate yet common mistake of racial profiling and misidentification almost cost this innocent boy his life.  Because the police continue to racially profile and misidentify black males, we are too frightened to put this behind us.  And no, because of racial profiling and misidentification, the police do not represent or serve the community in which these “unfortunate mistakes” occur.

“Upon review, the police chief concluded the officer was respectful and professional during the child’s temporary detention. Nevertheless, he stated “We understand that something like this has an impact on all parties involved.  As the chief of police, I want to apologize that this incident has such an effect on this young man and his family.”

The Illusion of Whiteness

The police officer was respectful and professional.  The child was not physically harmed.  The child’s detention was temporary.  There was a meaningful apology to the young man and his family. and understanding that this impacted all parties involved included the responding police officers. 

The Realness of Blackness

Understanding that the police officer was respectful and professional does not transform the reality that he pointed his firearm, handcuffed, and detained a 12-year-old boy taking out the trash who he had misidentified. The apology loses its validity as the 12-year-old boy is described as the “young man” and his family.  Once again, being miscategorized as a young man when he is a child only adds to the psychological trauma being experienced by this family.

“The community to consider the all the facts of the situation before making a judgement.”

The illusion of Whiteness

Let’s not be hasty to rush to judge the actions of the police.  We as the community want all the facts.

The Realness of Blackness

Black males are repeatedly judged as criminal by the police due to the color of their skin.  Those suggesting the concern about being hasty continue to ignore ongoing incidents of racial profiling and misidentification by the police. Black people with many years of experience with police understand what has occurred in this situation.  The held beliefs of black males by the police and the community they serve will continue… It is for Black people living under law enforcement to identify ways in which to protect their children when they come under the control of the police.

When a Black Male Encounters the Police:

• Know that the police officer will ask you for identification, and it is legal for them to do so.
• Know that your identifying information will be compared to a national criminal database to identify any warrants or other notices against you.
• Know that the police officer will be looking for suspicious behavior from you or from anyone with you.
• Be prepared for a possible stop and search of your personal space and belongings.

Actions a Black Male to do during the Encounter:

• Keep your hands in plain sight and away from your body.

• Immediately tell the officer: I AM UNARMED.  I AM NOT A THREAT TO YOU.

• Always comply and follow the police officer’s instructions.  Speak in a respectful tone.

• If you are under the age of 18, inform the police officer of your age.

• If you are under the age of 18, request that your parent, legal guardian, or legal representative be present.

• If you choose not to speak, inform the police officer of your intent to remain silent until you have representation.  After that, immediately stop talking.

• Use your powers of observation.  Document the incident and any concerns regarding any behavior during the encounter.

• Remember to get the date, time, and location of the stop as well as the license plate, vehicle number, and the badge number of the police officer and the name of the police department.  All the necessary information is visible.  Do not ask the police officer for this information.

• If needed, file a complaint with the local police department.  Do not attempt to resolve the issue with the police officer in the streets.  This is the purpose of administrative and judicial hearings.

• Remember, that the police officer is entitled to use deadly force if he/she feels physically threatened.

Concluding Words:

The Illusion of Whiteness & The Realness of Blackness

Both groups reside on the same planet, are citizens in the same country and yet exist in two separate consciousness. Whites generally view the police as “protectors” committed to serve the community.  Blacks generally view the police as “enforcers of law and order”.  The views of Whites are true to themselves which allow them to live in an illusion when it comes to how they view the relationship between the police and the black community.  An example of the illusion is the statement by the police following this incident:

“Our hope is we can put this unfortunate case of “wrong place, wrong time” behind us and continue to represent the community that we serve.”

The truth is that the police want to get this unfortunate case behind them. However, the illusion is the community they serve. The police like the community they serve, live in fear of Black males. This deep-seated fear grants the conscious power to racially profile, intimidate and create psychological trauma as a means of controlling the population.

The police in unholstering a weapon, handcuffing and detaining a 12-year-old simply got caught “with its pants down” and now seeks to do damage control using words such as “respectful”, “professional behavior” and “temporary detainment”.  And then there is the plea by the police chief:

“The community to consider all the facts of the situation before making a judgement.”

And what community is the police chief referring to?  Can he be referring to the Black community in which his police officers racially profiled black males which led to a 12-year-old being misidentified as an adult responsible for car thefts?  Or is he appealing to the White community where such mistakes are understandable but no such incidents being reported?

There is the illusion of the understanding “that something like this has an impact on all parties involved”. Yet, what about the realness of Black people that the simple act of one’s child taking out the trash could have resulted in his death? There was no follow up with the father who is powerless in protecting his son from those who are sworn to protect them.

And there is the reality that this 12-year-old due to no fault of his own now has a permanent psychological wound because trauma in its permanency never ever goes away… only to be relived, reexperienced and intrusive in childhood and will continue into his adulthood.

Whatever meaningful understanding this terrible incident has will be forever carried by this child all while his family was destroyed by the those reporting of the incident.  The reporting staff stated:

“The family is exploring all legal options” including “the possibility of filing a lawsuit”, the lawyers said.”

So now… it all about the money.  Let’s downplay what happened.  Let’s focused on the reality…money.  That is going to resolve everything.

Until the next time.  And of course, there will be a next time.  Living in fear of black skin demands… a next time.

Regarding the “White Illusion”, James Baldwin stated,

 “The really terrible thing, old buddy, is that you must accept them.  And I mean that very seriously.  You must accept them with love.  For these innocent people have no other hope.  They are, in effect, still trapped in a history which they do not understand, and until they understand it, they cannot be released from it.  They have had to believe for many years that black men are inferior to white men.” The Fire Next Time, 1963.

Until the next time…

Remaining … In Our Corner.

In Our Corner: Unwanted and Undesired Without The Village

“Donovan was unarmed, and he was abiding by police commands to come out of his room when he was shot in cold blood by Officer Anderson.”

-Rex Elliott, Attorney for the Lewis Family

“There was no justification—let me be clear—no justification for officer Anderson to shoot an unarmed man trying to get out of bed as police officers were instructing him to do so.  Donovan was asleep before officers arrived and had warning that CPD would burst into his apartment.”

-Rex Elliott, attorney for the Lewis Family

“They (the family) want this police officer punished, …. not permitted to be out on the streets again.  We anticipated filing an action against the police officer that engaged in this reckless conduct.”

-Rex Elliott, Attorney for the Lewis Family

“They are just a few of the many people that have had their lives altered forever because of the events of early Tuesday morning.”

-Rex Elliott, Attorney for the Lewis Family, referring to Donovan’s parents, siblings, grandmother, aunt and family friends

“He wasn’t armed. He wasn’t dangerous. He wasn’t America’s most wanted. He was just Donovan.”

-Reverend Jemimah Posey, comments at the Donovan Lewis funeral

“Fear is your enemy. Trust in God. The North Star will guide you.”

-The Black preacher advising Harriet as she prepares to flee bondage, the movie Harriet (2019)

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My Dear Readers,

Here we go again. Another young Black life taken much too soon, under circumstances that are unimaginable yet imaginable, unbelievable yet very believable, and incomprehensible, yet expected by Black folks, having repeatedly endured this nightmare.

Donovan Lewis’s death by police action follows a line of recent deaths by police including George Floyd, Michael Brown, Freddie Gray, Walter Scott and countless others, the most recent being Jayland Walker, who was shot 46 times, including 8 shotgun blasts, over a traffic violation. He had refused to pull over and ran from his vehicle.  The police allegedly recovered a firearm from the car, so they said.

Meanwhile, a worried community of Black folks, nationwide are sitting, nervously awaiting the outcome of the most recent shooting.  Here speaks the concerns and frustrations of one parent:

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Dear Dr. Kane,

I am the mother of three sons ages 16, 12 and 8.  The killing of that black young man in Columbus OH by the police has frightened me to the point where I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, and I am unable to focus on work because I am so scared for the safety of my sons. I am southern born and raised, and although I now live in Washington State, I have long memories of police brutalizing and terrorizing Black males. I am very frightened and concerned.

I have no place to turn for help.  I have spoken to my pastor and all he tells me is to fear not, pray and trust in God.  I am a good Christian. School has now begun, and I place anointing oil on my sons every morning as I send them out to school and still it is simply not enough! I am so afraid for my children.

I just don’t understand the lack of response.  Black folks in church are talking about these killings and yet there is nothing being done about it.  It’s like since it hasn’t happened to them, they are not concerned, however, it may happen to my sons.  I am living in fear. I go to bed afraid and wake up afraid.

My sons are well mannered, are attentive and love school and sports. I know that they get profiled because of their race.  In reaching out to Black men for assistance, the attitude has been one of indifference.  More than one suggested that I need to get accustomed to police interaction and racial profiling as this is going to be an ongoing occurrence in their lives.  I have asked the men at the church to talk to my sons but all they want to do is to talk about football. 

It takes a village! I feel that my community– my village– church and black men have failed me.  I wish the Black men in the church would come together to teach our children how to be safe when interacting with the police.  I am unable to talk to my white coworkers as they think I am being paranoid.  I am concerned that my older son will mouth off should he be confronted by the police.  My middle child was recently stopped and questioned by the police because they said he looks older and my youngest is afraid to sleep in his bed after watching the news about that Black man being killed in his bed by the police.  He has now returned to wetting the bed and is afraid to sleep alone.

I have sought help from my church and the people in my community.  Although I am being told not to be afraid and to pray, I am more fearful and desperate for more help to protect my children.  When I get a notification on my cell from one of my sons, I become overwhelmed with fear. I can’t think, I am shaking. It is only until I have assurance that they are okay that I can relax.  And then there is the next time.   It’s like I am waiting for the negative to happen.  Am I being paranoid?  Do you have any suggestions? I would appreciate hearing back from you.

Village Mom Seeking Assistance, Bellevue, WA

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My Dear Readers,

In the writer’s statement, she mentions that “it takes a village,” referring to the African proverb that speaks to the cultural and societal belief that family, community and communalism are needed to teach, develop, and protect a child through adulthood. While this sentiment has strong psychological and emotional roots within the values of Black Americans, the ongoing and consistent psychological and emotional pressures being faced by the Black American community, many caused by its own deficiencies and weaknesses, render it unable to protect itself from macroaggressions that result in the psychological harm and/or physical deaths of its children.  Although the idea of the “village” permeates the community, this is not the lived reality being experienced by this parent seeking assistance from her church and within the community.  Comments from the black men in her community merely acknowledge the indifference.  

It is the natural instinct for a parent to want to protect one’s child from danger.  However, as Black parents seek balance, it would be beneficial to teach our children how to empower themselves as they are being prepared to enter an environment that is hostile and suspicious to both their ethnicity, race and gender.

                        FEAR: Conceptualizing the Psychological & Emotional Impacts

Fear can be defined as an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain or a threat.  For this parent, several subtypes of trauma, including microaggression (racial profiling by the police) macroaggression (physical injury/death), and invisibility syndrome (fear that her sons’ talents, abilities and character are not acknowledged or valued) combine to induce the distress that she shares in her letter.

Fear has psychologically and emotionally impacted the African American community to the point where it has been stuck in the status of existence, that is, the acceptance of an imposed way of life and survival.

Historically, the Black community has faced continuous and consistent pressure in the form of violence, domestic terrorism and state sanctioned laws/ordinances such as the Black Codes, Jim Crow laws, Sundown laws, and redlining.  Although its members are capable of achieving and advancing in industry, economics, medicine, arts and letters, they remained blocked in stages of existing and survivorship and “living in FEAR,” a psychological and emotional status which continues to limit the community to this very day. Therefore, “living in FEAR” can be viewed as the following:

F (foundation) the justifications or cause of held beliefs.

E (expectations) strong beliefs that something will happen or be the case in the future.

A (assumptions) things that are accepted as true or certain to happen.

R (reality) the world that is being experienced or the state of things as they actually exist.

In this conceptualization of fear, African Americans are simply reacting to their deeply held beliefs and experiences based on their 403 years of experience in this country, through direct experience and passed downward intergenerationally. 

In reconceptualizing fear, it is essential that Black people recognize the psychological impacts of internalizing fear and seek transformation towards the following:

• Fear is not the enemy. It is simply an emotion that is a normal response to a specific situation.  
• Fear during times of danger can serve as a positive attribute in assisting the individual in being aware, alert, aroused, aloof and most importantly …staying alive.
• Rather than rejecting fear, we must want to embrace and integrate it as an aid that can move the individual from surviving an ordeal to empowerment psychologically. 

By holding on to the illusion of village communalism as “acting as one,” the Black American community is not psychologically or emotionally prepared to conceptually transform from “living in FEAR” to “living with FEAR.”

Reconceptualizing FEAR

Psychologically and emotionally, “living in FEAR” has been a disservice because it limits the group’s options for response to this trauma to acceptance of a way of life and survival, or simply existing.

In reconceptualizing fear, it is essential that fear be viewed as a resource that can be utilized to move individual forward, not as preventing them from achieving goals, objectives and outcomes.

Therefore “living with FEAR” can be viewed as the following:

F (facing) confronting, accepting or dealing with a difficult task, fact or situation.

E (embracing) accepting or supporting a belief willingly and enthusiastically.

A (acknowledging) accepting or appreciation of the truth or recognition of fact or an object.

R (responding) the advocacy of reply as in words or in action.

To this end, the Black parent can consider the following:  

• Letting go of the concept of the “village” i.e., communalism and accept the reality of the fragmented and weakened community structure. 
• Reject the advice to “not be afraid” and view fear as what is simply is: an emotion to respond to.
• Transform the response of desperation to one of empowerment. Develop strategies that will reduce feelings of helplessness and reinforce safety regarding the children’s interaction with police.

There can be nothing stronger, more meaningful and more built on belief, faith and trust, (BFT) than the love a Black mother has for her child.  Understanding their fears, given the history of police interaction with Black males and the risk of death, incarceration and trauma it is imperative that Black mothers transform from “living in FEAR” by implementing developmental strategies that will empower their children and thereby allowing the parent to be able to wake and sleep every day with empowerment “living with FEAR.”

Behavioral Strategies-Police Interactions

“Mama said life is like a box of chocolates.  You never know what you are going to get.”

-Forrest Gump (1994),

In her letter, the Black parent alleges that she was told that she “need(ed) to get used to police interaction and racial profiling as these are going to be ongoing occurrences.”

These comments are partially correct; in the lives of Black people, especially with males, racial profiling and police interaction ARE going to be ongoing occurrences.  However, what is incorrect is the belief that this is something to get used to. Words can have powerful psychological impacts on those who hear them, and in this case, what comes across is further trauma and insensitivity to the lived experience.  Specifically, the word “need” as a verb, defined as to “require (something) because it is essential or very important. In essence, this Black parent is being told that it is very important for her to get used to these brutal injustices.

The Black parent (s) can best serve their children and themselves by

• Transformation- moving from positions of survival and desperation to that of living, growth and development.
• Education of their children and themselves in the expectation and normalizing of police interaction.
• Psychological/emotional preparation for possible racial profiling. When interaction with the police occurs, it is unknown what type of prejudice (cognitive, affective or conative) will be involved in the interaction.

Understanding ABC’s of Behavior

The Black parent can also reinforce self-empowerment in their children by normalizing the police stop or interaction, and by teaching them to accept their internalized fears when responding to police directions and interactions.  The fear of police in our community is normal and some police want the individual to be fearful as it allows them to maintain control.  However, it is essential that the individual maintain a “sense of presence” by “living with FEAR” and not “living in FEAR”.  This can be achieved by teaching your children the following:

• (A) Advocacy– Know when to “hold” or “show” your cards.  Know when to speak and what to say.
• (B) Balance– Remember that your power lies within you and cannot be taken from you without your consent.  Balance your anger with your wisdom.
• (C) Calmness– Use your balance and your empowerment to project calmness to the outside world.  Use this to defuse the situation.

When Black Males Encounter the Police

 “My sons are well mannered, are attentive and love school and sports. I know that they get profiled because of their race.” 

-Village Mom Seeking Assistance

This is true of many black children. However, it is important to remember that police officers, in interacting with numerous different individuals on a daily basis, carry their internalized prejudices with them, including, but not limited to the belief that some individuals, particularly African Americans, are not “well mannered, or attentive”.  Black youth can impower themselves by planning out their actions and behaviors when they encounter law enforcement:

• Know that the police officer will ask for identification and that it is legal for the police officer to do so.
• Know that the police officer will seek verification in a criminal database to identify any warrants or other notices.
• Know that the police officer will be looking for suspicious behavior from the individual being questioned or anyone who is in company of the individual.
• Be prepared for a possible “stop and search” of one’s personal space (body) and belongings.

The Police Encounter

• Never…Never.. Ever …run from the police.

• Remember, that the police officer is entitled to use deadly force if he/she feels physically threatened.

The Black parent must emphasize these two points with their children as the first and most important parts of a process to ensure their safety during an encounter with the police. The rest of the process includes the following:

• Immediately telling the police officer: I AM UNARMED.  I AM NOT A THREAT TO YOU
• Always comply and follow the police officer’s instructions.  Speak in a respectful tone.
• If you are under the age of 18, immediately inform the police officer of your age.
• If you are under the age of 18, immediately request that your parent, legal guardian or legal representative be present prior to answering questions.
• If you are above the age of 18, and have chosen not to speak, inform the police officer of your intent to remain silent until you have legal representation.  Afterwards, immediately stop talking.
• Use your powers of observation.  Document the incident and any concerns regarding ant behaviors occurring during the encounter. Memory can lapse quickly.  Document immediately following the encounter.
• Remember to document following information: the date, time and location; the license plate and vehicle number, the badge number of the police officer and the name of the police department.
• DO NOT seek to resolve your complaint in the street.  File a formal complaint
• with the Internal Affairs Section within the local sheriff or police department.

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Concluding Words-Dr. Kane

“I have asked the men at the church to talk to my sons but all they want to do is to talk about football.” 

-Village Mom Seeking Assistance

“Black people love their children with a kind of obsession.  You are all we have, and you come to us endangered.”

-Ta-Nehisi Coates, Author “Between the World and Me. (2015)

Dear Village Mom Seeking Assistance,

In responding to your letter, I have sought to provide ideas, strategies, concepts and protocols that could be utilized in transforming fear and empowering your children and self. You have written that your village, church and Black men have failed you at the time in which you needed them the most.  I encourage you to transform from the positions of desperation and helplessness to that of empowerment and growth, preparing your sons to protect themselves during encounters with police.  Racial profiling is an uneasy reality in the lives of Black people.

Please dismiss the notion of paranoid as indicated by your white coworkers.  As a Black person, you are responding to your lived experience, which has included frequent incidences of brutality towards Black males.  As a parent with three sons, you are displaying vigilance to abnormal experiences that your white coworkers have no direct knowledge or experience with. Simply stated, when your white coworkers get encountered by the police, they receive “community policing, while your sons, during similar encounters, receive “law enforcement” instead.

Holding to your strength in your Christian faith, it is important for you to channel the belief, faith and trust you have in your village, church and Black men to the self, which will enable you to empower your sons in expecting and normalizing upcoming police encounters. Once again, it is essential to let go of the concept that “fear is the enemy” and instead, see fear as a desired and wanted emotion  that can assist you and your sons in keeping them  aware, alert, aroused, aloof and most importantly…alive.  It would be most advantageous for you to stop looking and depending on assistance that is not forthcoming and look within your abilities to provide the assistance in developing the strategies that will empower and protect your sons.

Wishing you the best,

Dr. Kane

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“That is the philosophy of the disembodied, of a people who control nothing, who can protect nothing, who are made to fear not just the criminals among them but the police who lord over them with all the moral authority of a protection racket.  It was only after that I understood love that I understood the grip of my mother’s hand. She knew that the galaxy itself could kill me, that all of me cold be shattered and all of her legacy spilled upon the curb like bum wine.”

-Ta-Nehisi Coates, Between The World And Me

IN MEMORIAM of Black Males Killed in Police Related Deaths

The universe shrank
when you went away.
Every time I thought your name,
stars fell upon me.
— Henry Dumas (poet, social activist, teacher)

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Updated June 9, 2022

Donovan Lewis, Columbus, Ohio Shot by Columbus Police Officer August 30, 2022 Daunte Demetrius Wright, October 27, 2000 – April 11, 2021 Brooklyn Center, Minnesota Shot: Brooklyn Center Police Officer	Jayland Walker, Akron, Ohio Shot: 46 times by 8 Police Officers June 27, 2022 Marvin David Scott III, 1995 – March 14, 2021 McKinney, Texas Asphyxiated: Collin County Jail Detention Officers
Patrick Lynn Warren Sr., October 7, 1968 – January 10, 2021 Killeen, Texas Shot: Killeen Police Officer	Vincent “Vinny” M. Belmonte, September 14, 2001 – January 5, 2021 Cleveland, Ohio Shot: Cleveland Police Officer
Angelo Quinto, March 10, 1990 – December 26, 2020 Antioch, California Knee on neck/Asphyxiated	Andre Maurice Hill, May 23, 1973 – December 22, 2020 Columbus, Ohio Shot: Columbus Police Officer
Casey Christopher Goodson Jr., January 30, 1997 – December 4, 2020 Columbus, Ohio Shot: Franklin County Sheriff Deputy	Angelo “AJ” Crooms, May 15, 2004 – November 13, 2020 Cocoa, Florida Shot: Brevard County Sheriff Deputies
Sincere Pierce, April 2, 2002 – November 13, 2020 Cocoa, Florida Shot: Brevard County Sheriff Deputies	Marcellis Stinnette, June 17, 2001 – October 20, 2020 Waukegan, Illinois Shot: Waukegan Police Officer
Jonathan Dwayne Price, November 3, 1988 – October 3, 2020 Wolfe City, Texas Tasered/Shot: Wolfe City Police Officer	Dijon Durand Kizzee, February 5, 1991 – August 31, 2020 Los Angeles, California Shot: Los Angeles County Police
Rayshard Brooks, January 31, 1993 – June 12, 2020 Atlanta, Georgia Shot: Atlanta Police Officer	Carlos Carson, May 16, 1984 – June 6, 2020 Tulsa, Oklahoma Pepper Sprayed/Shot in Head: Knights Inn Tulsa Armed Security Guard, former sergeant and detention officer with the Tulsa County Sheriff’s Office
David McAtee, August 3, 1966 – June 1, 2020 Louisville, Kentucky Shot: Louisville Metropolitan Police Officer	Tony “Tony the TIger” McDade, 1982 – May 27, 2020 Tallahassee, Florida Shot: Tallahassee Police Officers
George Perry Floyd, October 14, 1973 – May 25, 2020 Powderhorn, Minneapolis, Minnesota Knee on neck/Asphyxiated: Minneapolis Police Officer	Dreasjon “Sean” Reed, 1999 – May 6, 2020 Indianapolis, Indiana Shot: Unidentified Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Officer
Michael Brent Charles Ramos, January 1, 1978 – April 24, 2020 Austin, Texas Shot: Austin Police Detectives	Daniel T. Prude, September 20, 1978 – March 30, 2020 Rochester, New York Asphyxiation: Rochester Police Officers
Breonna Taylor, June 5, 1993 – March 13, 2020 Louisville, Kentucky Shot: Louisville Metro Police Officers	Manuel “Mannie” Elijah Ellis, August 28, 1986 – March 3, 2020 Tacoma, Washington Physical restraint/Hypoxia: Tacoma Police Officers
William Howard Green, March 16, 1976 – January 27, 2020 Temple Hills, Maryland Shot: January 27, 2020, Prince George’s County Police Officer	John Elliot Neville, 1962 – December 4, 2019 Winston-Salem, North Carolina Asphyxiated /Heart Attack/Brain Injury: Forsyth County Sheriff Officers
Atatiana Koquice Jefferson, November 28, 1990 – October 12, 2019 Fort Worth, Texas Shot: Fort Worth Police Officer	Elijah McClain, February 25, 1996 – August 30, 2019 Aurora, Colorado Chokehold/Ketamine/Heart Attack: Aurora Police Officers and Paramedic
Ronald Greene, September 28, 1969 – May 10, 2019 Monroe, Louisiana Stun gun/Force: Louisiana State Police	Javier Ambler, October 7, 1978 – March 28, 2019 Austin, Texas Tasered/Electrocuted: Williamson County Sheriff Deputy
Sterling Lapree Higgins, October 27, 1981 – March 25, 2019 Union City, Tennessee Choke hold/Asphyxiation: Union City Police Officer and Obion County Sheriff Deputies	Gregory Lloyd Edwards, September 23, 1980 – December 10, 2018 Brevard County Jail, Cocoa, Florida Kneed, Punched, Pepper Sprayed, Tasered, and Strapped into a restraint chair with a spit hood over his head/Failure to Provide Medical Care: Brevard County Sheriffs
Emantic “EJ” Fitzgerald Bradford Jr., June 18, 1997 – November 22, 2018 Hoover, Alabama Shot: Unidentified Hoover Police Officers	Charles “Chop” Roundtree Jr., September 5, 2000 – October 17, 2018 San Antonio, Texas Shot: San Antonio Police Officer
Chinedu Okobi, February 13, 1982 – October 3, 2018 Millbrae, California Tasered/Electrocuted: San Mateo County Sheriff Sergeant and Sheriff Deputies	Anton Milbert LaRue Black, October 18, 1998 – September 15, 2018 Greensboro, Maryland Tasered/Sudden Cardiac Arrest: Greensboro Police Officers
Botham Shem Jean, September 29, 1991 – September 6, 2018 Dallas, Texas Shot: Dallas Police Officer	Antwon Rose Jr., July 12, 2000 – June 19, 2018 East Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania Shot: East Pittsburgh Police Officer
Saheed Vassell, December 22, 1983 – April 4, 2018 Brooklyn, New York City, New York Shot: Four Unnamed New York City Police Officers	Stephon Alonzo Clark, August 10, 1995 – March 18, 2018 Sacramento, California Shot: Sacramento Police Officers
Dennis Plowden Jr., 1992 – December 28, 2017 East Germantown, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Shot: Philadelphia Police Officer	Bijan Ghaisar, September 4, 1992 – November 27, 2017 George Washington Memorial Parkway, Alexandria, Virginia Shot: U.S. Park Police Officers
Aaron Bailey, 1972 – June 29, 2017 Indianapolis, Indiana Shot: Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Officers	Charleena Chavon Lyles, April 24, 1987 – June 18, 2017 Seattle, Washington Shot: Seattle Police Officers
Fetus of Charleena Chavon Lyles (14-15 weeks), June 18, 2017 Seattle, Washington Shot: Seattle Police Officers	Jordan Edwards, October 25, 2001 – April 29, 2017 Balch Springs, Texas Shot: Balch Springs Officer
Chad Robertson, 1992 – February 15, 2017 Chicago, Illinois Shot: Chicago Police Officer	Deborah Danner,  September 25, 1950 – October 18, 2016 The Bronx, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officers
Alfred Olango, July 29, 1978 – September 27, 2016 El Cajon, California Shot: El Cajon Police Officers	Terence Crutcher, August 16, 1976 – September 16, 2016 Tulsa, Oklahoma Shot: Tulsa Police Officer
Terrence LeDell Sterling, July 31, 1985 – September 11, 2016 Washington, DC Shot: Washington Metropolitan Police Officer	Korryn Gaines, August 24, 1993 – August 1, 2016 Randallstown, Maryland Shot: Baltimore County Police
Joseph Curtis Mann, 1966 – July 11, 2016 Sacramento, California Shot: Sacramento Police Officers	Philando Castile, July 16, 1983 – July 6, 2016 Falcon Heights, Minnesota Shot: St. Anthony Police Officer
Alton Sterling, June 14, 1979 – July 5, 2016 Baton Rouge, Louisiana Shot: Baton Rouge Police Officers	Bettie “Betty Boo” Jones, 1960 – December 26, 2015 Chicago, Illinois Shot: Chicago Police Officer
Quintonio LeGrier, April 29, 1996 – December 26, 2015 Chicago, Illinois Shot: Chicago Police Officer	Corey Lamar Jones, February 3, 1984 – October 18, 2015 Palm Beach Gardens, Florida Shot: Palm Beach Gardens Police Officer
Jamar O’Neal Clark, May 3, 1991 – November 16, 2015 Minneapolis, Minnesota Shot: Minneapolis Police Officers	Jeremy “Bam Bam” McDole, 1987 – September 23, 2015 Wilmington, Delaware Shot: Wilmington Police Officers
India Kager, June 9, 1988 – September 5, 2015 Virginia Beach, Virginia Shot: Virginia Beach Police Officers	Samuel Vincent DuBose, March 12, 1972 – July 19, 2015 Cincinnati, Ohio Shot: University of Cincinnati Police Officer
Sandra Bland, February 7, 1987 – July 13, 2015 Waller County, Texas Excessive Force/Wrongful Death/Suicide(?) Texas State Trooper	Brendon K. Glenn, 1986 – May 5, 2015 Venice, California Shot: May 5, 2015, Los Angeles Police Officer
Freddie Carlos Gray Jr., August 16, 1989 – April 19, 2015 Baltimore, Maryland Brute Force/Spinal Injuries: Baltimore City Police Officers	Walter Lamar Scott, February 9, 1965 – April 4, 2015 North Charleston, South Carolina Shot: North Charleston Police Officer
Eric Courtney Harris, October 10, 1971 – April 2, 2015 Tulsa, Oklahoma Shot: Tulsa County Reserve Deputy	Phillip Gregory White, 1982 – March 31, 2015 Vineland, New Jersey K-9 Mauling/Respiratory distress: Vineland Police Officers
Mya Shawatza Hall, December 5, 1987 – March 30, 2015 Fort Meade, Maryland Shot: National Security Agency Police Officers Tony Terrell Robinson, Jr., October 18, 1995 – March 6, 2015 Madison, Wisconsin Shot: Madison Police Officer	Meagan Hockaday, August 27, 1988 – March 28, 2015 Oxnard, California Shot: Oxnard Police Officer Janisha Fonville, March 3, 1994 – February 18 2015 Charlotte, North Carolina Shot: Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Officer
Natasha McKenna, January 9, 1978 – February 8, 2015 Fairfax County, Virginia Tasered/Cardiac Arrest: Fairfax County Sheriff Deputies	Jerame C. Reid, June 8, 1978 – December 30, 2014 Bridgeton, New Jersey Shot: Bridgeton Police Officer
Rumain Brisbon, November 24, 1980 – December 2, 2014 Phoenix, Arizona Shot: Phoenix Police Officer	Tamir Rice, June 15, 2002 – November 22, 2014 Cleveland, Ohio Shot: Cleveland Police Officer
Akai Kareem Gurley, November 12, 1986 – November 20, 2014 Brooklyn, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officer	Tanisha N. Anderson, January 22, 1977 – November 13, 2014 Cleveland, Ohio Physically Restrained/Brute Force: Cleveland Police Officers
Dante Parker, August 14, 1977 – August 12, 2014 Victorville, California Tasered/Excessive Force: San Bernardino County Sheriff Deputies	Ezell Ford, October 14, 1988 – August 11, 2014 Florence, Los Angeles, California Shot: Los Angeles Police Officers
Michael Brown Jr., May 20, 1996 – August 9, 2014 Ferguson, Missouri Shot: Ferguson Police Officer	John Crawford III, July 29, 1992 – August 5, 2014 Beavercreek, Ohio Shot: Beavercreek Police Officer
Tyree Woodson, July 8, 1976 – August 2, 2014 Baltimore, Maryland Shot: Baltimore City Police Officer	Eric Garner, September 15, 1970 – July 17, 2014 Staten Island, New York Choke hold/Suffocated: New York City Police Officer
Dontre Hamilton, January 20, 1983 – April 30, 2014 Milwaukee, Wisconsin Shot: Milwaukee Police Officer	Victor White III, September 11, 1991 – March 3, 2014 New Iberia, Louisiana Shot: Iberia Parish Sheriff Deputy
Gabriella Monique Nevarez, November 25, 1991 – March 2, 2014 Citrus Heights, California Shot: Citrus Heights Police Officers	Yvette Smith, December 18, 1966 – February 16, 2014 Bastrop County, Texas Shot: Bastrop County Sheriff Deputy
McKenzie J. Cochran, August 25, 1988 – January 29, 2014 Southfield, Michigan Pepper Sprayed/Compression Asphyxiation: Northland Mall Security Guards	Jordan Baker, 1988 – January 16, 2014 Houston, Texas Shot:, Off-duty Houston Police Officer
Andy Lopez, June 2, 2000 – October 22, 2013 Santa Rosa, California Shot: Sonoma County Sheriff Deputy	Miriam Iris Carey, August 12, 1979 – October 3, 2013 Washington, DC Shot 26 times: U. S. Secret Service Officer
Barrington “BJ” Williams, 1988 – September 17, 2013 New York City, New York Neglect/Disdain/Asthma Attack: New York City Police Officers	Jonathan Ferrell, October 11, 1989 – September 14, 2013 Charlotte, North Carolina Shot:, Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Officer
Carlos Alcis, 1970 – August 15, 2013 Brooklyn, New York City Heart Attack/Neglect: New York City Police Officers	Larry Eugene Jackson Jr., November 29, 1980 – July 26, 2013 Austin, Texas Shot: Austin Police Detective
Kyam Livingston, July 29, 1975 – July 21, 2013 New York City, New York Neglect/Ignored pleas for help: New York City Police Officers	Clinton R. Allen, September 26, 1987 – March 10, 2013 Dallas, Texas Tasered and Shot: Dallas Police Officer
Kimani “KiKi” Gray, October 19, 1996 – March 9, 2013 Brooklyn, New York City, New York Shot: New York Police Officers	Kayla Moore, April 17, 1971 – February 13, 2013 Berkeley, California Restrained face-down prone:, Berkeley Police Officers
Jamaal Moore Sr., 1989 – December 15, 2012 Chicago, Illinois Shot: Chicago Police Officer	Johnnie Kamahi Warren, February 26, 1968 – February 13, 2012 Dothan, Alabama Tasered/Electrocuted: Houston County (AL) Sheriff Deputy
Shelly Marie Frey, April 21, 1985 – December 6, 2012 Houston, Texas Shot: Off-duty Harris County Sheriff’s Deputy	Darnisha Diana Harris, December 11, 1996 – December 2, 2012 Breaux Bridge, Louisiana Shot: Breaux Bridge Police Office
Timothy Russell, December 9. 1968 – November 29, 2012 Cleveland, Ohio 137 Rounds/Shot 23 times:, Cleveland Police Officers	Malissa Williams, June 20, 1982 – November 29, 2012 Cleveland, Ohio 137 Rounds/Shot 24 times: Cleveland Police Officers
Noel Palanco, November 28, 1989 – October 4, 2012 Queens, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officers	Reynaldo Cuevas, January 6, 1992 – September 7, 2012 Bronx, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officer
Chavis Carter, 1991 – July 28, 2012 Jonesboro, Arkansas Shot: Jonesboro Police Officer	Alesia Thomas, June 1, 1977 – July 22, 2012 Los Angeles, California Brutal Force/Beaten: Los Angeles Police Officers
Shantel Davis, May 26, 1989 – June 14, 2012 New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officer	Sharmel T. Edwards, October 10, 1962 – April 21, 2012 Las Vegas, Nevada Shot: Las Vegas Police Officers
Tamon Robinson, December 21, 1985 – April 18, 2012 Brooklyn, New York City, New York Run over by police car: New York City Police Officers	Ervin Lee Jefferson, III, 1994 – March 24, 2012 Atlanta, Georgia Shot: Shepperson Security & Escort Services Security Guards
Kendrec McDade, May 5, 1992 – March 24, 2012 Pasadena, California Shot: Pasadena Police Officers	Rekia Boyd, November 5, 1989 – March 21, 2012 Chicago, Illinois Shot: Off-duty Chicago Police Detective
Shereese Francis, 1982 – March 15, 2012 Queens, New York City, New York Suffocated to death: New York City Police Officers	Jersey K. Green, June 17, 1974 – March 12, 2012 Aurora, Illinois Tasered/Electrocuted: Aurora Police Officers
Wendell James Allen, December 19, 1991 – March 7, 2012 New Orleans, Louisiana Shot: New Orleans Police Officer	Nehemiah Lazar Dillard, July 29, 1982 – March 5, 2012 Gainesville, Florida Tasered/Electrocuted: Alachua County Sheriff Deputies
Dante’ Lamar Price, July 18, 1986 – March 1, 2012 Dayton, Ohio Shot: Ranger Security Guards	Raymond Luther Allen Jr., 1978 – February 29, 2012 Galveston, Texas Tasered/Electrocuted: Galveston Police Officers
Manual Levi Loggins Jr., February 22, 1980 – February 7, 2012 San Clemente, Orange County, California Shot: Orange County Sheriff Deputy	Ramarley Graham, April 12, 1993 – February 2, 2012 The Bronx, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officer
Kenneth Chamberlain Sr., April 12, 1943 – November 19, 2011 White Plains, New York Tasered/Electrocuted/Shot: White Plains Police Officers	Alonzo Ashley, June 10, 1982 – July 18, 2011 Denver, Colorado Tasered/Electrocuted: Denver Police Officers
Derek Williams, January 23, 1989 – July 6, 2011 Milwaukee, Wisconsin Blunt Force/Respiratory distress: Milwaukee Police Officers	Raheim Brown, Jr., March 4, 1990 – January 22, 2011 Oakland, California Shot: Oakland Unified School District Police
Reginald Doucet, June 3, 1985 – January 14, 2011 Los Angeles, California Shot: Los Angeles Police Officer	Derrick Jones, September 30, 1973 – November 8, 2010 Oakland, California Shot: Oakland Police Officers
Danroy “DJ” Henry Jr., October 29, 1990 – October 17, 2010 Pleasantville, New York Shot: Pleasantville Police Officer	Aiyana Mo’Nay Stanley-Jones, July 20, 2002 – May 16, 2010 Detroit, Michigan Shot: Detroit Police Officer
Steven Eugene Washington, September 20, 1982 – March 20, 2010 Los Angeles, California Shot: Los Angeles County Police	Aaron Campbell, September 7, 1984 – January 29, 2010 Portland, Oregon Shot: Portland Police Officer
Kiwane Carrington, July 14, 1994 – October 9, 2009 Champaign, Illinois Shot: Champaign Police Officer	Victor Steen, November 11, 1991 – October 3, 2009 Pensacola, Florida Tasered/Run over: Pensacola Police Officer
Shem Walker, March 18, 1960 – July 11, 2009 Brooklyn, New York Shot: New York City Undercover C-94 Police Officer	Oscar Grant III, February 27, 1986 – January 1, 2009 Oakland, California Shot: BART Police Officer
Tarika Wilson, October 30, 1981 – January 4, 2008 Lima, Ohio Shot: Lima Police Officer	DeAunta Terrel Farrow, September 7, 1994 – June 22, 2007 West Memphis, Arkansas Shot: West Memphis (AR) Police Officer
Sean Bell, May 23, 1983 – November 25, 2006 Queens, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officers	Kathryn Johnston, June 26, 1914 – November 21, 2006 Atlanta, Georgia Shot: Undercover Atlanta Police Officers
Ronald Curtis Madison, March 1, 1965 – September 4, 2005 Danziger Bridge, New Orleans, Louisiana Shot: New Orleans Police Officers	James B. Brissette Jr., November 6, 1987 – September 4, 2005 Danziger Bridge, New Orleans, Louisiana Shot: New Orleans Police Officers
Henry “Ace” Glover, October 2, 1973 – September 2, 2005 New Orleans, Louisiana Shot: New Orleans Police Officers	Timothy Stansbury, Jr., November 16, 1984 – January 24, 2004 Brooklyn, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officer
Ousmane Zongo, 1960 – May 22, 2003 New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officer	Alberta Spruill, 1946 – May 16, 2003 New York City, New York Stun grenade thrown into her apartment led to a heart attack: New York City Police Officer
Kendra Sarie James, December 24, 1981 – May 5, 2003 Portland, Oregon Shot: Portland Police Officer	Orlando Barlow, December 29, 1974 – February 28, 2003 Las Vegas, Nevada Shot: Las Vegas Police Officer
Nelson Martinez Mendez, 1977 – August 8, 2001 Bellevue, Washington Shot: Bellevue Police Officer	Timothy DeWayne Thomas Jr., July 25, 1981 – April 7, 2001 Cincinnati, Ohio Shot: Cincinnati Police Patrolman
Ronald Beasley, 1964 – June 12, 2000 Dellwood, Missouri Shot: Dellwood Police Officers	Earl Murray, 1964 – June 12, 2000 Dellwood, Missouri Shot: Dellwood Police Officers
Patrick Moses Dorismond, February 28, 1974 – March 16, 2000 New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officer	Prince Carmen Jones Jr., March 30, 1975 – September 1, 2000 Fairfax County, Virginia Shot: Prince George’s County Police Officer
Malcolm Ferguson, October 31, 1976 – March 1, 2000 The Bronx, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officer	LaTanya Haggerty, 1973 – June 4, 1999 Chicago, Illinois Shot: Chicago Police Officer
Margaret LaVerne Mitchell, 1945 – May 21, 1999 Los Angeles, California Shot: Los Angeles Police Officer	Amadou Diallo, September 2, 1975 – February 4, 1999 The Bronx, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officers
Tyisha Shenee Miller, March 9, 1979 – December 28, 1998 Riverside, California Shot: Riverside Police Officers	Dannette “Strawberry” Daniels, January 25, 1966 – June 7, 1997 Newark, New Jersey Shot: Newark Police Officer
Frankie Ann Perkins, 1960 – March 22, 1997 Chicago, Illinois Brutal Force/Strangled: Chicago Police Officers	Nicholas Heyward Jr., August 26, 1981 – September 27, 1994 Brooklyn, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officer
Mary Mitchell, 1950 – November 3, 1991 The Bronx, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officer	Yvonne Smallwood, July 26, 1959 – December 9, 1987 New York City, New York Severely beaten/Massive blood clot: New York City Police Officers
Eleanor Bumpers, August 22, 1918 – October 29, 1984 The Bronx, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officer	Michael Jerome Stewart, May 9, 1958 – September 28, 1983 New York City, New York Brutal Force: New York City Transit Police
Eula Mae Love, August 8, 1939 – January 3, 1979 Los Angeles, California Shot: Los Angeles County Police Officers	Arthur Miller Jr., 1943 – June 14, 1978 Brooklyn, New York City, New York Chokehold/Strangled: New York City Police Officers
Randolph Evans, April 5, 1961 – November 25, 1976 Brooklyn, New York City, New York Shot in head: New York City Police Officer	Barry Gene Evans, August 29, 1958 – February 10, 1976 Los Angeles, California Shot: Los Angeles Police Officers
Rita Lloyd, November 2, 1956 – January 27, 1973 New York City, New York Shot: New York City Police Officer	Phillip Lafayette Gibbs, September 1, 1948 – May 15, 1970 Jackson, Mississippi Shot: Jackson State University Police Officers
James Earl Green, 1953 – May 15, 1970 Jackson, Mississippi Shot: Jackson State University Police Officers	Henry Dumas, July 20, 1934 – May 23, 1968 Harlem, New York City, New York Shot: New York City Transit Police Officer

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Until the next time,

Remaining … In Our Corner

In Our Corner: Reconceptualizing FEAR- Moving From Distancing to Embracing

“Black women don’t have respect for Black men.  And if they do, its all caked in patriarchy, religion and other nonsense.”

-a Black man, on Black women

“Black women are fake. Black people are toxic. We don’t know how to talk to each other.  We hate each other.”

-a Black man, on Black women & Black people

“My mother and sister (both Black women) agreed…Black women are fucked up. Don’t deal with Black women.  Find someone of another group who does not have drama!”

-a Black woman, on other Black women

“My son knows his father ain’t nothing. Black men aren’t shit.  You can love them, but you can’t trust them.”

-a Black Woman to her son, on his father, and subconsciously about himself

“My mother taught me to never trust a Black man with your heart, he will fail you and break your heart …. Every time.”

-a Black woman on Black men

“In a Black man, I want a meaningful relationship and here I am at 55, all I found so far is heartache, drama, lies and betrayal.  I am sad, alone and yet better off by myself.”

-a Black woman, on relationships

“Why should I respect my elders? They don’t respect me.  You guys just want to play us. You guys are a bunch of losers.”

– an adolescent Black male, on adult Black males

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My Dear Readers,

It is once again my pleasure to write to you and in doing so, share clinical skill, experience and wisdom I have gained during my walk along my landscape, which is the LIFE I live with the opportunity to experience my surroundings.

Recently, I celebrated my 69^th birthday.  To those living in the comfort of white privilege, reaching this “peak” may not be worthy of mentioning.  However, the reality remains that while we reside in the same country, we live in two separate distinct worlds.  One world is relaxed and comfortable in its protection from people characterized by the stereotypes and fears created by its citizens, while in another world, others are forced to live in a world of oppression, fear, and control through enforcement of the law.  In this second world, my world, small infractions can result in extreme and deadly consequences such as those suffered by Jayland Walker of Akron, OH, who was recently killed by police during a traffic stop.

However, today’s writing is not about the fear held by the privileged and powerful.  Here, my writing will speak to the fear that permeates the African American community.  I am referring to the fear that clouds the interactions between African American women, men, adolescents, and children. I refer to the fear that psychologically impacts intimacy in family and partner relationships. I speak of the same fear that is taught by adults to children, reinforced during adolescence and realized upon arrival into the young adult world.

African Americans face unique Choices at the Crossroads throughout their lives, and those lives are uniquely impacted by the decision as to the direction one takes. In my 35 years of clinical and therapeutic work, I have devised a clinical protocol, Self- Empowerment Leaping Forward (SELF), in which the individual has the following within the therapeutic environment:

• A Safe and Secure
• Space to either
• Sit with Silence or
• Speak openly about
• Secretive (hidden and rooted)
• Submerged (unresolved)
• Substances (materials)
• Surfacing (arising) upon 
• Self‘s psychological landscape.

My clinical work has shown that African Americans are and remain deeply clinically impacted by their historical, current, and daily experiences, particularly in interactions with those who seek to maintain privilege, power, and control over their movements.  From a clinical perspective, I place African Americans into two generalized groups: the Waiting Dead and the Walking Wounded.  The Waiting Dead can be defined as those who have all but given up on progressing and building a life for themselves and their families and are simply waiting for the end of their lives, whereas the Walking Wounded are the Survivors, who fight for dignity, power, and control day in and day out.

In these battles, where African Americans fail is that they often do not explore the impact that psychological trauma has had and is currently having on their lives, and how that manifests in the difficulties they experience with their mental wellness, ability to experience intimacy, and their relationships with their family and community. That, combined with an unwillingness to seek relief through valid psychological treatment approaches that can improve the quality of life, leads African Americans to instead seek measures that sustain survival methods, but do not provide sustained healing and resistance to the continued daily exposure to racism and psychological trauma.

In my work, I have seen that the African American community is a community of secrets that reinforces suffering in silence to gain temporary relief from the psychological pain it experiences every day.  The community also suffers from being silent about the psychological wounding within the family and between women and men. The African American community is bound together by secrecy, and yet continues to maintain distancing through the concept of FEAR. 

The root of this secrecy is that the African American family is vested in secrets that are not publicly shared for fear that this information may damage the image of the family.  One patient, who came out to his family about his homosexuality, recalled that his parents’ response and concern were more focused on whom he shared this information with, since their main concern was whether he would bring shame upon the family.  This individual, believing that his truth was a source of shame for the family, kept this secret for 15 years, creating additional psychological distress. This distress led to two suicide attempts and years of consumption of alcohol and drug abuse to medicate his psychological pain.

Fear simply defined is “an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain or a threat”.  In this situation, the family’s fear was based on the threat to the family’s image within the African American community. From the son’s perspective, the parents saw the threat to his physical and mental health as a more tolerable risk than potentially losing their “good name.”  The fear of losing the relationship with the family, or worse, being blamed for the family’s shame, led the son to maintain the secret, sacrificing himself for the protection of his family.

Like other normalized emotions such as sadness, happiness, or disappointment, fear is simply an emotion.  However, the African American community has created its own concept of fear; taking it outside the range of normal emotions to create and reinforce a patten of behavior that includes running, distancing, exclusion, and isolation.

This concept can be best described as the common sentiment FEAR: (False Expectations (or Experiences) Appearing Real), consists of beliefs, values and comments that are reinforced by interactions among the African American community. The focus becomes how such beliefs, values and comments are being utilized to create and maintain distance, resulting in distrust, loss of communication, and effectively running away from achieving and establishing dialogue which can create new beliefs, values and open communication.

Reconceptualizing FEAR-Facing, Embracing, Acknowledging & Responding = EMPOWERMENT 

First, we can begin the reconceptualization by transforming our view of fear to be what it really is: an emotion that is normal just like other emotions.  Second, we can remove the negative aspect that is motivated with fear by viewing fear as a positive and desired emotion. Third, we can follow the following protocol:

• Facing– The emotion of fear is to be confronted directly by the psychological self, rather than distancing the psychological self from it.  The objective is to transform our attitude towards fear to wanting it rather than rejecting it.   
• Embracing-The emotion of fear is to be held within the entity of the psychological self, not to be pushed away.  It is for the individual to create the imagery of placing “one’s loving arms” around the object that is feared.
• Acknowledging– fear, as an emotion, is accepted by the individual as theirs and not one else’s. It is in aloneness that the individual seeks warmth for and from the specific fear.
• Responding–the individual continues to handle the fear warmly as the individual continues to move into the tomorrow with the fear.
• Empowerment– The protocol culminates in transformation: the individual no longer seeks external power, but instead achieves empowerment, which is internalized within the psychological self.  It is within this transformation that the individual no longer holds on to the illusion of power, but now realizes that empowerment allows them to walk the landscape known as LIFE.

An example that illustrates this revised concept of FEAR:

Mr. P lives in a community of which he is one of a few African Americans.  He is a corporate professional driving an expensive automobile.  In session, he expresses his anger and frustration at being racially profiled, followed and being pulled over by the police during numerous traffic stops for “minor violations.”

“Dr. Kane, I felt l so angry, scared and just could not react when I saw that the cop with his hand on his weapon and standing in a stance as if he was going to shoot me.  My mind went blank, and I began to stutter as I answered his questions.  What the fuck was I supposed to do? He’s the law and I am supposed to trust him, but he looked like he was going to shoot me. I went home feeling weak, got drunk and cried like a girl.  I wished I had stood up to him.”

Clinical Observations and Considerations

As he describes his experience, the patient is reacting to the incident.  He is viewing himself as powerless and now sees his manhood as being challenged not only by the police, but by himself.  He risks placing the self in a situation in which an interaction with the police could be escalated.  Although he is a professional, a homeowner, and earns a six-figure salary, he is clinically at the Surviving stage of “Walking the Landscape.”  The clinical objective at this point is to help the patient progress to the Driving stage in which he becomes empowered and therefore responsive rather than reactive to the situation he is in.

We begin by transforming the way in which the patient views the incident.  In doing so, the objective is that the next time this happens, he plans specific behaviors rather than simply having a knee-jerk reaction, which, as he related in session, is about feeling powerless or lacking in power.  Let’s transform the concept of FEAR when being stopped by the police.

Facing: Understand that on the street, the police have the power and you do not.  The focus is to control yourself and the scene you are now a part of.  Understand that the police, like others, may believe stereotypes of Black males, and their interactions with you will be based on those stereotypes or their past interactions with other Black males.  Do not assume that an officer of similar racial ethnic background will treat you differently.  When you interact with a police officer, visualize the color BLUE and nothing more.  Understand that the police officer, when interacting with you, may also be psychologically impacted by his own experiences, stereotypes and fears.  

Embracing: Understand that your fear is simply an emotion that now has been alerted and aroused. Visualize placing your loving arms around your body and hugging yourself.  Allow yourself to be okay with what you are feeling and to normalize the feeling of distress.  Take a moment and visualize yourself in the future as momentarily detained and on your way to your destination prior to be stopped by the police.

Acknowledging: Understand that most importantly, you are no longer in control.  You are now under the control of the police.  Accept that for this short time, you are under the police officer’s direct control.  You cannot leave the area until the police officer grants consent for you to do so.  As you have already embraced your fear, now acknowledge and accept that given this specific situation, having fear is a positive and natural reaction to the situation, and not a weakness or a negative statement about you.

Responding: Understand that you can respond to the situation in a calm, collected, and calculated manner.  Provide the police officer with the requested information, such as your driver license, registration, and insurance card. Be polite in your responses.  Do not respond in ways that will lengthen the police stop or escalate the interaction.  Do not engage in arguments, actions or any behaviors in which the police officer can perceive as a threat to the officer’s safety.  If you feel that you have been treated unfairly by the police officer, do not seek to resolve the matter in the street, as you will lose.  Instead, hold the officer accountable by filing a written complaint with the Internal Affairs Section.  

Empowerment -Understand that although you lack power during the encounter, you have the empowerment to engage in a manner that will further your ability to be safe and achieve a safe outcome.

In later sessions, Mr. P reported having less concerns about being stopped or pulled over by the police.  He adds that having filed several complaints with the police chief and mayor’s office in his city, the police stops have ceased.

Concluding Comments

“Why should I respect my elders? They don’t respect me.  You guys just want to play us. You guys are a bunch of losers.”

-an adolescent Black male, on adult Black males

My Dear Readers,

This quote speaks of the psychological pain that continues to permeate the African American community. In session, a 15-year-old adolescent recalled his memories of elementary school when Black men would always arrive on the first day of the new school year.  They would be dressed in suits and ties or wearing uniforms of their various professions and occupations.  He states:  

“They would high five us kids, patting us on the back and applauding us as we walked between them into the school as they lined up in two rows.  And then after all that cheering, photo taking for the media, they would disappear.  The next time they were seen was the following year at the beginning of school.  They just wanted to look good in front of the cameras.  They didn’t care about us.  They used us.  They don’t respect us.  I don’t care about or respect them.”

His words reflect the common themes indicated in the quotes at the beginning of this blog.  As the community continues to wrestle with psychological trauma created by internalized hate, distrust, and distancing from each other, they also continue to react to the psychological trauma of micro aggressive and macro aggressive assaults that continue to appear without warming or notice. 

The 17 psychological traumas and 16 forms of racism, combined with psychological traumas within the community, exacerbate the psychological distress and create what I call the waiting dead and walking wounded. The waiting dead, having been bombarded by external assaults and continuing to ignored and unsupported within their communities and families have given up “wanting to live.” The walking wounded experience the same traumas but continue to hold to survivorship.  It is within the work of psychotherapy utilizing the protocol of Self- Empowerment Leaping Forward that the survivor can continue to walk their landscape and experience the stages of LIFE:  Driving (empowerment), Striving (setting the direction and pace) and Thriving (identification of goals and accomplishment of objectives).

Now than ever before, there are more African Americans wanting to seek mental health treatment. However, there are not enough mental health providers available to serve African American communities nationwide. Specifically, data from the American Psychiatric Association shows that only 2 % of the estimated 41,000 psychiatrists and 4% of psychologists in the US are African American.  Such low numbers of African American mental health providers are placing a heavy strain on the industry, forcing such providers to make difficult decisions in identifying which individuals will receive mental health services and treatment such as psychiatric hospitalization, medication and psychotherapy.  Understanding the pressures faced by African Americans, it explains the reasoning that African Americans have the highest rates of posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD)(8.7%) than any other ethnic groups.

A failure of the African American community is its focus on reacting rather than responding to the external challenges such as  microaggression/macroaggressions, or the internal challenges that face the Waiting Dead or Walking Wounded.  Clinically, what is desired, wanted and recommended is comprehensive planning and strategies within the clinical realm to assist its members to respond rather than react to the challenges as indicated.  One such strategy is to understand how the emotion of fear has been conceptualized and how the current concept continues to handicap the community’s belief system, values and self-imagery.  The recommendation would be to focus on reconceptualizing the emotion of fear so that the idea of fear would be constructive rather than destructive.

Throughout the years, African Americans have known suffering in this land for 403 years and this suffering is likely to continue as those who fear Black skin continue to seek power, privilege, and control over Black skin.  We cannot afford to wait for relief to come; for 403 years the relief has not arrived, and it is upon us to provide opportunities for ourselves to create mental health wellness as we seek to walk the landscape we know as life.

**********************************************************************

 The Negro Speaks of Rivers

BY LANGSTON HUGHES

I’ve known rivers:

I’ve known rivers ancient as the world and older than the flow of human blood in human veins.

My soul has grown deep like the rivers.

I bathed in the Euphrates when dawns were young.

I built my hut near the Congo and it lulled me to sleep.

I looked upon the Nile and raised the pyramids above it.

I heard the singing of the Mississippi when Abe Lincoln went down to New Orleans, and I’ve seen its muddy bosom turn all golden in the sunset.

I’ve known rivers:

Ancient, dusky rivers.

My soul has grown deep like the rivers.

********************************************************************

Until the next time,

Remaining … In Our Corner

In Our Corner: Responding to Microaggressions in the Pursuit of Self-Acceptance

Sticks & Stones (Variation #1)

Alexander William Kinglake, 1833

“Sticks and stones may break my bones

But words will never hurt me”

Sticks & Stones (Variation #2)

The African Methodist Episcopal Church. The Christian Recorder, March 1862.

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never break me.”

Sticks & Stones (Variation #3)

Absent Friends, 2004.

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can tear me apart.”

Catch A Nigger by His Toe

A Children’s Counting Rhyme (1888)

“Eeny, meena, mina, mo,

Catch a nigger by the toe,

If he hollers let him go,

Eena, meena, mina, mo”

“So, let me try to understand this video. Here are a group of young Black men who are wearing baggy clothes with their pants hanging off their waists acting like human beings. Go figure? Gentlemen, you make your families proud. Outstanding!!!!”

• George Saint Louis. Writer, LinkedIn, July 28, 2020

My Dear Readers,

At the time of this writing, as our country continues to struggle with COVID-19, 6.09 million Americans have contracted the disease with over 185,000 deaths. That is the national toll, tangible numbers signifying the trauma that we all as Americans have experienced in the last six months. What is not as easily visible yet has also been widely experienced are the microaggressions suffered by black, brown, and Indigenous people of color (BBIPOC) at the hands of others.

Microaggressions are those common, daily, often brief, verbal, behavioral or environmental indignities, whether intentional or unintentional, that communicate hostile, derogatory or negative prejudicial slights and insults towards any group, particularly culturally or racially marginalized groups.

The words of George Saint Louis quoted in the opening of this blog are an example of these microaggressions.

Recently, I saw a video showing compassionate assistance given to an elderly white couple by a three, young-adult black men.  The elders were both nearing 100 years old. The men, upon seeing that the husband was unable to get his wife into their vehicle, assisted them by physically placing the woman into the vehicle and then helping the elderly man into the driver’s seat as well.

This video was viewed over 4.5 million times on Facebook and now was being shown on LinkedIn.

George Saint Louis’ statement was in response to this video.

His words were racist, sarcastic and demeaning. They were hurled with the intent to ridicule and inflict psychological harm on a group of young black men.

Instead of asking why George Saint Louis chose to respond in that manner, I ask what about the young men?

What follows after the psychological assault? How are they impacted as individuals? Are such assaults expected to be forgiven and forgotten? Are they expected to simply ignore the words and actions and brush them aside like the “Sticks and Stones” rhyme taught?

During America’s slave period, the whip also known as the “lash” was utilized to shame, humiliate and psychologically intimidate enslaved people into submission. Its impact was further increased when other enslaved people were required to observe the lashing of their peers to heighten the shame of the ordeal. Today, the observance and similar outcome is achieved via social media as seen by the 4.5 million Facebook viewers of the three young black men seeking to assist an elderly white couple.

The injuries endured from microaggressions remain permanent wounds embedded upon the psychological self that never, ever go away.  All African Americans have memories they could share of psychological trauma created by microaggressions.

For example, I remember as a child growing up in the segregated South, being told to leave the homes of white playmates for no other reason than for the color of my skin. I can attest that the psychological pain from incidences like that is everlasting and the wounds from these will reopen and bleed when such microaggressions occur later in life.

This continual reopening of wounds is due to the vulnerability of never knowing when, where or from whom, the comment, action, behavior or seemingly innocent question would be coming from.

In another example from my life, as a graduate student early-on in my program, one of my professors questioned whether white female students were writing my papers in exchange for “sexual favors.”  Evidently, the quality of the research work I was doing was “suspect”.

African Americans, like others in this country, walk the landscape of life. During the walk, there will be challenges, roadblocks, and obstacles made by others.  Some of these will be based out of fear, some out of ignorance, others out of jealousy and the remaining are simply from hate.

I currently spend dozens of hours, weekly, with African Americans engaging in a deliberate strategy that my white colleagues due to a combination of training, western orientation/approach or ignorance are unable to do… listening. Many of my colleagues simply hear and the information travels in one ear and out the other. In listening, I seek to provide a safe space for the expression and release of pain and suffering.

Yet, among patients, there is a common theme: avoidance, denial, rejection of what has been experienced, the few who choose to self-medicate through alcohol or drugs, or those who seek to hide in big houses, expensive cars and flashy clothes while suffering silently.

The questions often asked include the following:

• How do I avoid these feelings?
• When will the pain of hurtful words go away?
• What tricks can I use to just forget about it?

Avoidance? Distancing? Tricks? Self-deception?

Following is a story of a man, who, while walking the landscape, has found his path blocked not only by others but by himself. Here is his story.

*********************************************

Dear Dr. Kane,

 I am writing because I have lost my way.  I have read your writings and hope you can help me.  I am an African American male who has lived my entire life in white America.  I am responding to the trauma of whiteness and their power that is overwhelming me.

 I feel that my life has been one of surrendering my power to white people.  I grew up learning that they were always right and that I was wrong.

I grew up in the Pacific Northwest in a predominantly white town that has now become a mid-sized city.  My family was one of the very few black people in the area.  My playmates, classmates and friends were all white. 

 All through school I was known as Black Joe.  Not Joseph, my given name, or Joey or just Joe, but rather Black Joe.  When I was in the third grade, a white classmate called me a “nigger” and everyone laughed, and pointed fingers at me. At the time I did not know what a “nigger” was, but I knew from the way it was said and the laughter that followed, it was a bad thing.

 My parents did not speak up for me.  In fact, they remained quiet as I took the abuse.  They, just like the white people around me, never felt that I would be successful.  I went on to prove them wrong. I was smart, I knew I was going to be successful.

 My mistake was that in focusing on proving myself acceptable to them, I gave them my power.  As an adult, I paid a terrible price for my success. I had the high paying job, expensive car, and a big house but I also have had a series of extramarital affairs resulting in divorces, not being on speaking terms with my adult children, and a strong dependence on alcohol.

 I wanted to take back my power, so I made the commitment to attend a local Alcohol Anonymous meeting that was conducted via video conferencing due to the coronavirus outbreak.  For the first time, I spoke out about the pain of being a black man living in a white town. 

 I got a lot of positive feedback and I was feeling really good until someone spoke over the receiver, at first calling out my name and then repeatedly saying “nigger, nigger, nigger, nigger, nigger.”  The facilitator shut off the microphone, but it was too late.  I felt humiliated and ashamed.

 I felt so betrayed. I never returned to another AA meeting.  What was really telling was I had completely forgotten about the incident of being called a nigger in the 3^rd grade but the incident at the AA meeting took me back to that time.  I am still drinking heavily to this very day. I am drinking an average of two half-gallons of scotch per week.

 I have sought acceptance from others and have failed to obtain this.  As I write to you, I don’t know what I want and yet, in your response, I hope to find wisdom that will show me the way.

 Bless you Dr. Kane,

Wandering Alone Mount Vernon, WA 

**************************************************

My Dear Readers,

His story is similar to many African American men and women who have suffered emotionally while seeking to climb the “ladder of acceptance”. What they never really understand is that this ladder is an illusion.  Acceptance by others may never be achieved. And if it is, it may be withdrawn or snatched away without hesitation, justification, or notice.

The 3R’s & The Survival of the Fittest

Psychological trauma has been a key factor in the lives of African Americans beginning in early childhood.  Where their white peers are allowed to just learn the lessons of the 3 R’s (reading, writing and arithmetic) without the concern of racial bias, black children are abandoned in the white educational system and, barring strong parental interaction or oversight at school, they are left to navigate the educational landscape alone, expected to survive exposure to racism, rejection, and rebuke without support.

“I have sought acceptance from others and have failed to obtain this.”

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs: Acceptance and Understanding

“Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is a motivational theory in psychology comprising a five-tier model of human needs, often depicted as hierarchical levels within a pyramid. Needs lower down in the hierarchy must be satisfied before individuals can attend to needs higher up. From the bottom of the hierarchy upwards, the needs are physiological, safety, love and belonging, esteem, and self-actualization.”

McLeod, Saul. “Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs”. Psychology Today. March 20, 2020.

Once the physiological and safety needs are met, Maslow states that “the person… will hunger for affectionate relationships with people in general for acceptance into the group.”

Although acceptance can be defined as the action or process of being received by the group as adequate or suitable, it is also defined as the internalized need to be accepted as you are.  The desire to be accepted as you are, can also lead to the willingness to tolerate difficult situations.

It is the nature of human beings to want to be accepted, valued, validated, and viewed with esteem from a desired group. Problems develop when the value, validation and esteem is one sided or focused in one direction.

The Reality of Black & White

“We are still living in a society where dark things are devalued, and white things are valued.”

• Margaret Beale Spencer, 2010

Due to the way that education system set up, and values are learned, the idea that they are superior is consciously reinforced to the white children while the idea that BBIPOC people are inferior is subconsciously, unconsciously, and continually reinforced to black and brown children. Nearly 67 years following the landmark Brown vs. Board of Education ruling and 12 years after the election of the country first black president, white children have an overwhelming white bias, and black children have a bias towards white (Spencer 2010).

The Willingness to Tolerate Difficult Situations

The trap that sucks in many African Americans is the willingness to tolerate difficult situations in order to gain acceptance.  In many cases, these situations are traumatic and psychologically wounding, often resulting in emotional and mental scarring.

The problem is that consciously we know that acceptance is not something that can be forced, yet subconsciously and unconsciously, there is a willingness to tolerate the difficult situation until acceptance has been achieved.

The Myth of Sisyphus: The Story of African Americans Being “Played”

In Greek mythology, Sisyphus is forced to roll an immense boulder up a hill only for it to roll down every time it neared the top, repeating this action for eternity.  Sisyphus was undeterred; he pushed the rock right back up every time it rolled down.  He refused to surrender to gravity.

The moral of this story is we must learn to embrace our purpose (the rock) in life. Once we accept it as the objective of our being, we should give everything it takes to achieve it.  Most importantly, no matter how much we lose in our quest, we must never back down until we fulfill our potential.

So, what is the bottom line we learn from Sisyphus?  Embrace the rock. Be persistent.  Work hard.  Never give up.

Now, let’s apply this to African Americans struggling to be accepted by a hostile group who view themselves as superior and those seeking “acceptance” are inferior.  In this modern-day uphill struggle, the “rock” is the acceptance African Americans seek to achieve from the dominant group.

The reality (and not moral) of this story is that African Americans are being played. They are allowing themselves to be believe the illusion that they will ever be acceptable to the dominant group.  Yet, as they continue to do so, to seek acceptance from others, they continue to embrace the rock. To be persistent.  To work hard.  To never give up.”

“You’re Fooling You

“Ah tell me who’s fooling who.

You ain’t fooling me.

You’re fooling you.

You’re Fooling You, The Dramatics (1975)

 The Golden Rule: “You Have To Be Twice As Good As Them”

Rowan: “Did I not raise you for better? How many times have I told you? You have to be what?”

Olivia:   “Twice as good.”

Rowan: “You have to be twice as good to get half of what they have.”

Scandal. ABC. 2012-2018.

For whites, there is a saying: “Whoever has the gold makes the rules”. For black people it is a statement of exclusion and survival. Variations of the preceding quote have been drummed into the minds of African Americans by their parents inter-generationally since slavery over 400 years ago.

An Unequal Playing Field

The effects of these parental demands upon black children is not only mentally taxing but can be emotionally overwhelming as well. They leave the children vulnerable to believing that striving for acceptance and eventually for personal success is like Sisyphus, rolling the rock up the mountain in order to “get half of what they have”. But before they even get there, they must first roll the rock up the mountain known as “acceptance.”

Self-Acceptance

It is known that acceptance and understanding are emotional needs to feel alright and to know that others accept you as you are.  However, this can be a slippery slope for African Americans who prioritized the “acceptance by others” over the acceptance of self.

Acceptance is an entity controlled from within the individual. Acceptance is an entity that cannot be forced.  Self-acceptance is an individual’s satisfaction or happiness with oneself, and it is a necessity for good mental wellness.

Self-acceptance, unlike acceptance by others, is an “alone” entity.  It involves self-understanding and a realistic, subjective awareness of one’s strengths and weaknesses.

In conclusion, self-acceptance is extremely important. If a person does not accept themselves for who they really are, they will continuously create ongoing problems within their own life.

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Concluding Words-Dr. Kane

“I once was lost, but now I am found, was blind, but now I see”

My Dear Young Man,

I appreciate the sharing of your story.  It is one to which many African Americans can relate.  Yours is a story of endurance, pain and suffering.  It is also a story of accomplishments and socio-economic achievement.

However, as you sought like Sisyphus to reach the top of the mountain, you fell for the trap of seeking their acceptance instead of seeking self-acceptance.  The acceptance of others may or may not ever come.  And yet, you ignored the cries, pleas and calling of the person most important in your life, the Self.

It is true that you have gained success and wealth yet, look at the price you paid for it. In trying to self-medicate, you are consuming a gallon of alcohol per week. If you continue on this road traveled by so many black men before you, it will only lead to your demise. The black community will have lost another valuable soul… taken too soon.

Your landscape can be open, vast and wide.  Or you can continue to slip quietly away filled with bitterness.  Though it didn’t seem like it, the person who hid in the darkness during the AA meeting calling out “nigger, nigger, nigger” gave you a gift. The gift of exposure. It showed you that that environment was not a safe place for you to be.

Five R’s of RELIEF

Instead of drowning your anguish in the darkness of alcohol; reach out and take a respite (step away), embrace your reactions, be reflective (balancing feeling & thoughts), be responsive to self (talk to me), and constantly reevaluate what occurred and how it was experienced.

The Impact of “Time Heals Wounds”

Historically black parents, so focused on their children’s success, have neglected protecting them from the psychological wounding of microaggressions.  We have been told that “time will heal wounds.”  This is not true.  Time does not heal, it is the work we do in therapy, over time that will heal the wounds.

What is true is that microaggressive wounds lie deeply in the hearts of the victims. Such words or actions can come from strangers, coworkers, family members and friends you may have known for many years.  The objective is not to either ignore, react, or to rise above the insult. The objective is to understand that the traumatic impact remains, but the wound will heal to the point that the traumatic impact will be lighter and have a much smaller influence as you walk your landscape.

As for myself, I remained psychologically impacted by the racially and sexually charged statement leveled at me in graduate school.  I remembered those words as I spoke before the United State Congress in 2008 as the Clinical Consultant in Clinical Traumatology for the Congressional Black Caucus. Those words were painful but, because of my own acceptance of self, I was able to continue my journey of self-discovery despite their influence.

Now, what will you do? Continue down the road well paved with the souls of many lost black men or will you walk your landscape and seek your journey of self-discovery? If you choose to seek self-discovery, the first step is prioritizing self-acceptance over acceptance by others.  In doing this as you interact with others; allow the following statement to guide you along the way.

Loving the Self

As much as I love you, I love me more.

Loving me more doesn’t mean I love you less.

It just means I love me more.

More.

Focus on the journey… not the destination.

******************************************

“Do not get lost in a sea of despair. Be hopeful, be optimistic. Our struggle is not the struggle of a day, a week, a month, or a year, it is the struggle of a lifetime. Never, ever be afraid to make some noise and get in good trouble, necessary trouble.”

• John Robert Lewis (1940-2020), Former US Congressman and Civil Rights Activist

 

Until the next time,

Remaining … in Our Corner

In Our Corner: The Seen, The Unseen and the Dimming of the Bonfires

“Once a profound truth has been seen, it cannot be ‘unseen’. There’s no ‘going back’ to the person you were. Even if such a possibility did exist… why would you want to?”

– Dave Sim, Cartoonist & Publisher

 

“Our police force was not created to serve black Americans; it was created to police black Americans and serve white Americans.”

– Ijeoma Oluo, So You Want to Talk About Race

 

“I know people get tired of hearing it but black people have got to keep saying it, throwing our conditions up into these people’s faces until something is done about the way they have treated us. We’ve just got to keep it in front of their eyes and their ears like the Jews have done. We’ve got to make them know and understand just how evil the things are that they did to us over all these years and are still doing to us today.”

– Miles Davis, Miles: The Autobiography

 

“I can hear you say, “What a horrible, irresponsible bastard!” And you’re right. I leap to agree with you. I am one of the most irresponsible beings that ever lived. Irresponsibility is part of my invisibility; any way you face it, it is a denial. But to whom can I be responsible, and why should I be, when you refuse to see me?”

– Ralph Ellison, Invisible Man

 

My Dear Readers,

Well, the “walking back,” has begun.  The explosion of anger and outrage following the murder of George Floyd by a white police officer that ignited protests and riots across the nation is waning, and the bonfires of action lit within the dominant group have begun to die out.

Still, the process is working. The people are finally being heard. State legislation regarding police reform is being passed and laws are being enacted.  Even President Trump, after a protracted silence, got involved and signed a watered-down executive order that, on its face, pretended to alter police policies but ultimately left it up to the agencies to enact.

The white liberal progressives are also adding their support. One social work organization is urging its members to pressure their representatives into acknowledging that Trump’s executive order is not “as strong as the organization would wish, but it is a start” and suggest that we work together in the “spirit of collaboration”. Really?

 

“In the Spirit of Collaboration”

This statement is loaded with catch phrases that signal that it is time to return to normal. “Not as strong as the organization would wish”, and “It is a start…” is language that coddles those in power into thinking that their half-hearted attempts at pacifying the enraged masses is “a step in the right direction” as if an actual effort was made. Working together “in the spirit of collaboration”, means nothing more than a return to the old normal with flowery new language and more black blood in the streets.

On June 12, 2020, another black man, Rayshard Brooks, was shot and killed by a white police officer in Atlanta, GA. Four days afterward, on June 16, 2020, Trump issued the Executive Order “Safe Policing for Safe Communities”.

Less than a week later, on June 21, 2020, an NYPD police officer was suspended without pay following video showing him using an illegal chokehold on an African American man.

Are the police uninformed or is it a return to business as usual?

 

Intellectual Knowledge vs Experiential Persecution

Knowledge of racism, microaggressions, and macroaggressions can be learned about academically or experienced; known intellectually or lived through and felt.

When racism has only been observed from afar, its impacts can be rationalized down to…

“Privilege is the right to remain silent when others can’t.”

– Richie Norton, Author

But when it is lived through repeatedly, statements like…

“Every time the neck of a black man, woman or child is pinned to the ground by the knee of a police officer, every time a black man, woman or child is chased down in the street and shot simply for being there, every time a black man woman or child is judged purely because of color, every time a white individual crosses the street to avoid walking past a black man, woman or child, avoids sitting beside a black man, woman or child on public transport or says or does nothing when a black man, woman or child is being subjected to abuse is, in itself, a modern day lynching.” 

– R. Patient

Capture the depths of what is routinely being experienced.

The words of Norton, a white author, are no less true than those of Patient, but there is a difference. Norton only knows of the brutality and injustice, while to Patient, it is known and felt emotionally.

Today the dominant group can speak intellectually and rationally about the need for police reform however, having not experienced this, they cannot feel the trauma of police brutality and oppression. They cannot conceive of the suffering that comes from the understanding that policing arises from slavery and is intended for the control and oppression of black and brown people, today’s descendants of slaves.

Below is such a story…

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Dear Dr. Kane,

I am feeling helpless.  And I am so angry. I am a black man working in the corporate world.  I have had to put up with microaggressions all my life living in the Pacific Northwest. 

 I lived my life and shouldered my aches and pains with no one giving a damn.  I remembered one incident while walking with my white peers to lunch being stopped and questioned by the police.  They said I resemble a person of interest. 

They detained me, “handcuffing me for my safety” and after a few minutes and checking their computer system, let me go. Those bastards gave me a warming to be good and stay out of trouble.  There was no apology. 

 All this happened with my peers standing right there. They did nothing. They did not come to my aid. I was so humiliated. I graduated, top of my class gaining my MBA, and these bastards, the police tell me to be good and stay out trouble.

  It was a supposed to be a networking lunch.  No one said a word; I sat at the restaurant in silence.  I got up twice to go to the restroom to collect myself.  I was so angry, but I couldn’t scream or yell.  All I could do is cry like a girl. 

 Finally, I made an excuse and left, going home for the day.  When I got home, I got drunk and stayed drunk for two days calling in sick.  I know they knew the truth.  When I returned to work, they all pretended nothing had happened.

 Now some time later, George Floyd gets killed on video and now they are concerned about my welfare.  I am so sick and tired of the “I had no idea” or “is it really is that bad?” or approval of “Black Lives Matter.”  This is all bullshit.  They knew.  How could they not know?  My life wasn’t important before and now it is?

I am so confused and conflicted.  I want their help. Black lives do matter.  I am tired of being afraid when I see the cops driving behind me.  I know they are running my plates.   I get these aching feelings in my chest and stomach.

 I know we cannot succeed without their help.  White people and people of color have got to come together to make changes and undo racism.  But I am afraid that they will walk away like they have done so many times before.  I know the history.

 Now that I’ve got visibility, I don’t want to lose it.  I want change. What can I do besides drinking my pain away?

Covering Up Pain, Seattle WA

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My Dear Young Man,

You are seeking something from me that is beyond my skill to provide. I cannot make your pain go away. As a black man in America, no matter who you are, rich, poor, educated etc., your blackness will be weaponized against you.

Black men in powerful positions within government such as Cory Booker, US Senator of New Jersey, and Eric Holder, former Attorney General of the United States, have been racially profiled and stopped by local law enforcement.  Black women are not exempt from such microaggressions either. In July 2017, Aramis Ayala, state attorney for the Ninth Judicial Circuit Court of Florida, was profiled and pulled over in a stop occurring in the same county that she is the top prosecutorial official.

 

The Exhausting Toll: The “Black Tax”

There is a hidden tax that you pay for your freedom to be a black person in America.  It is not a formal tax, it is not listed in any of the local, state or federal tax codes.  It is a tax that is demanded by any white person with privilege at any time against a black person simply for being assumed as suspicious or by creating arbitrary rules on the basis of the color of one’s skin.

Bryant Gumbel, Real Sports host said it well,

“…It’s about the many instances of disrespect and incivility your color seems to engender, and being expected to somehow always restrain yourself, lest you not be what white Americans are never asked to be, a credit your race.”

To add clarity to his words, Gumbel provides the following examples:

“It’s about your son getting arrested for doing nothing more than walking while Black.”

“It’s about having to be more concerned than your white friends and associates for the safety of your grandkids.”

“It’s about the day in and day out fatigue of trying to explain the obvious to the clueless.”

“It’s about being asked to overlook blue failings and white failings so they can be conveniently viewed as Black issues.”

“It’s about being asked by so many what they should do or say about race when the easy answer lies in the privacy of each person’s heart. It’s the ‘Black tax.’”

 “It’s paid daily by me and every person of color in this country, and frankly, it’s exhausting.”

– Bryant Gumbel, https://people.com/tv/bryant-gumbel-explains-black-tax-hbo-real-sports/

 

My Dear Young Man,

To restate Bryant Gumbel, “It’s exhausting.” Many have crumbled under the weight of the burden of the black tax.  Many have failed due to the lack of belief, faith and trust in Self and gambled on the hope that others will rise to their aid.

You stated that your peers stood silently by while the police were humiliating you.  You added that you “cried like a girl” and went home and got drunk over two days…

How did that work out for you?

Did the alcohol resolve your problems?

Did the short term “feel good” resolve the long-term problem?

Did the black tax suddenly cease to exist?

 

The Journey of Self Discovery

My Dear Young Man,

Your failure in your actions was looking for others to speak up for you and when they didn’t, you became angry and disappointed in both them and in yourself.  You looked to them to support you and your safety and then when they failed, you drowned the wounded Self in alcohol and pity, then found when you returned to work, life had gone on as if nothing ever happened.

Those who hold the privilege have the choice to utilize it as a resource for good in helping others or as a tool of manipulation in which the benefit remains with the privileged.

“We will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.”

– Martin Luther King, Jr.

Rather than drown the injury with alcohol, make the choice of healing the wound while you seek to empower the psychological Self.  Rather than view your tears as a gendered weakness, have the insight to view them as a normal human response to your injury, as representation of your essence and your quality of being.

 

The Five Levels of The Journey

My Dear Young Man,

The journey of self-discovery is yours and yours alone.  You restrict or inhibit your journey by holding to destructive cultural and gender norms such as “real men do not shred tears” or expressing emotions is “validating weakness.”  Such internalized of beliefs will trap you in a mental and emotional enslavement that is now being maintained by the dominant group.

I will not validate the concept of resilience nor will I touch-on the concept of the shield, spear, and fire.  For all are illusionary for a Black male seeking Self while walking the journey of self-discovery.  It is within this frame that I suggest the following clinical concept: The Five Levels of The Journey to self-empowerment.

 

Self-Empowerment

In this walk we encounter five levels of experience:

1. The journey is bleak and lifeless for the individual. Life is barely lived, let alone enjoyed or even really experienced. Nothing is produced or gained by the individual at this level.

 

2. The focus of the journey is to remain alive and breathing. The individual attaches minimally to life, lives in fear, and is in a constant state of desperation and upheaval.  There is little gain for the individual at this level.

 

3. At this level, the search for empowerment begins. The individual wanders, seeking direction, and in doing so, learns to balance and reinforce the psychological self.  The individual understands the difference between living in fear and living with fear; and is balancing and implementing empowerment strategies in their life.

 

4. The individual has gained balance within their life and is fully experiencing the psychological Self. The individual has internalized the concept of living with fear and is successfully implementing empowerment strategies in their life.

 

5. The individual has obtained both full realizations of the psychological Self and transformation through self-empowerment has been achieved.

 

Transformation &The Reflection in the Mirror

My Dear Young Man,

In my work as a clinical traumatologist and psychotherapist, I serve as a companion and guide to those seeking to Walk the Landscape.  It is my personal and professional opinion that the therapeutic process is of value when we embrace both my role and the process as a whole.

Though I could ask where you think you fall along the five levels as identified above, would you:

Speak the truth as to what you need to see?

Speak the truth as to what you want to see?

Speak the truth as what is actually being reflected in the mirror?

Interestingly enough, your words are an indicator of what level you are.  You said,

 “I want change. What can I do besides drinking my pain away?”

This is an indication that you are teetering between existing and surviving with clear signs that as black man, you are dealing with unhealed wounds from previous psychological injuries.  Furthermore, there appears to be a lack of Self who desires or wishes for the support of others to be whole. As these desires or wishes have not been met, there is the relief sought via alcohol.

 

Walking the Landscape

My Dear Young Man,

First, stop seeking change. What you are currently doing is “change.”  The change you are involved in is oscillating between existing and surviving.  Instead, seek to reframe and refocus and move toward transformation in which there is no going back. Movement is forward.

Consider the five elements of Walking the Landscape:

1. Choices are presented.
2. Decisions are made and directions are chosen.
3. Consequences for choices and decisions are foreseen.
4. Wisdom is gained, lessons are learned, and both can be utilized for future experiences
5. Transformation through Self-Empowerment is achieved.

In your specific situation:

1. Choices: There are two paths.

• • Continue the path of consuming alcohol to medicate your pain and continue to be one of numerous black men who exist and survive as the “walking wounded”. OR…
  • Choose an alternative path; seek individual psychotherapy. Cease looking to others to provide support or wholeness.

2. Decisions: Make and Embrace your decision.

• • Accept your reality and continue to suffer, medicating your psychological injuries with alcohol. OR…
  • Work toward developing empowerment strategies. Learn to stand alone as you develop belief, faith, and trust in self.

3. Consequences: are your reactions and responses.

• • Allow your reactions (anger, disappointment, disillusionment) to be your response. OR…
  • Embrace your reactions, learning (anger, disappointment, disillusionment) and developing as well as sharing your response.

4. Wisdom: the foundation for the future.

• • I am a failure. I cannot succeed. The world is against me. OR…
  • I am solid. I am good.  I will achieve, despite the barriers and obstacles being placed before me.

5. Transformation

• • I am defeated. I have accepted my path. OR…
  • I am empowered. I have achieved self-discovery and continue Walking the Landscape that is mine and mine alone.

So young man, which path would you choose?  It is your landscape, your choice and most importantly…. your life.

 

Concluding Remarks – Dr. Kane

 My Dear Young Man,

I am now left with the difficult task of tying together the themes from my beginning statements directed to my beloved readers and the comments in response to your letter.

In my statements to the readership, I said:

“…the “walking back,” has begun.  The explosion of anger and outrage following the murder of George Floyd by a white police officer that ignited protests and riots across the nation is waning, and the bonfires of action lit within the dominant group have begun to die out.”

Also…

“The white liberal progressives are also adding their support. One social work organization is urging its members to pressure their representatives into acknowledging that Trump’s executive order is not “as strong as the organization would wish, but it is a start” and suggest that we work together in the ‘spirit of collaboration’.”

 

White Liberal Intent vs Impact

The white, liberal, and progressive leadership within the dominant group know that the core of white America has grown tired of governmental and public health restrictions due to COVID-19. This has led to a willingness to forego adhering to CDC guidelines (face masks and social distancing), even as case numbers and deaths rise, in favor of forcing an ill-timed “economic recovery”. Under this pressure, the dominant group is reluctant to continue adopting sweeping and decisive actions to protect the public health.

This same story is playing out with the Black Lives Matter protests.

The white liberal and progressive leadership see that the bonfires of action lit within the dominant group have begun to wane. That the Black Lives Matter protests may soon no longer be a priority for those involved. Now, in the “spirit of collaboration”, the white, progressive leadership is willing to bargain away the lives and liberties of black and brown Americans in favor of getting what they want while they can. People of color have once again become commodities.

They can do this out of pure, arrogantly used white privilege. The same white privilege shown by signers of the Declaration of Independence, of which 34 of the 47 (including John Hancock, Robert Livingston, Benjamin Franklin, and Thomas Jefferson) were slave owners. The idea that they can and will make decisions about and for you without consulting you.

The reality of white privilege is simple; it can either be used for manipulation and the reinforcement of trauma of others or it can be utilized as a resource to assist others to achieve the quality of life they are entitled to.

Though they intend to use it to assist, I hope, ultimately, that the arrogance of white privilege does not blind the progressive liberals from seeing the impact of carnage they are about to create.

I appreciate the message from Sheryll Cashin to those holding privilege.  She states:

“If you are white, you have an obligation to at least understand where the concept of whiteness comes from and to decide how you will proceed with that knowledge. I hope your journey will include an intentional choice to acquire dexterity.” 

 

Standing…. & Standing Alone

Now, in response to you…

 

My Dear Young Man,

In your letter, you concluded with the following:

“I know we cannot succeed without their help.  White people and people of color have got to come together to make changes and undo racism.  But I am afraid that they will walk away like they have done so many times before.  I know the history.”

For a person to act as if they are sightless and place his belief, faith, and trust in the hands of others, leaves him to wander and stumble without direction, existing and surviving as he creeps along the landscape.  You can see.  Open your eyes.  Regardless whether you stand with others or you stand alone, be empowered, and walk your landscape. It is yours and yours alone.

“If you believe in a cause, be willing to stand up for that cause with a million people or by yourself.”

– Otis S. Johnson, From “N Word” to Mr. Mayor: Experiencing the American Dream.

 ************************************************************************************

I Just Want to Live

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UIuSLBX74Ac

I’m a young black man

Doing all I can

To stand

Oh, but when I look around

And I see what’s being done to my kind

Everyday

I’m being hunted as prey

My people don’t want no trouble

We’ve had enough struggle

I just want to live

God protect me

I just want to live

I just want to live.

Song by Keedron Bryant (2020)

 

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Until the next time, Remaining … in Our Corner

In Our Corner: “Please Do Better”

“We want an immediate arrest because we don’t think there should be two justice systems in America – one for black America and one for white America.“

– Ben Crump, Attorney for the Arbery family

“Until this country can truly acknowledge the ills of its system, we will continue to see black blood drain our streets. “

– James Woodall, President, Georgia chapter of NAACP

“Stop, stop, we want to talk to you.”

-Gregory McMichael (words spoken to Ahmaud Arbery moments before killing him)

911 Call Proceeding the Death of Ahmaud Arbery

Caller: “There is a black male running down the street.” 

Police Dispatcher: “I just need to know what he was doing wrong.”

Caller: …

Minutes later Arbery was shot and killed

“I saw my son come into the world. And seeing him leave the world, it’s not something that I want to see, ever.”

– Wanda Cooper Jones, Ahmaud Arbery’s mother

“It’s just heart wrenching for him that he has to look at his other son and daughter and try to make sense of it. He really thinks that his son was lynched.”

-Ben Crump, Attorney speaking of Ahmaud Arbery’s father

“It’s hurtful.  I just got to be strong for the rest of my family. I got to be strong for my two children.  I just got to be strong for their mama too.”

-Marcus Arbery Sr., father of Ahmaud Arbery

“Your neighbor at [redacted] Satilla drive is Greg McMichael. Greg is retired Law Enforcement and also a Retired Investigator from the DA’s office. He said please call him day or night when you get action on your camera. His number is [Redacted].”

– 12/20/2019 text message from Glynn Police Officer Rash to homeowner, Larry English regarding contacting Gregory McMichael.

My Dear Readers,

I find myself awake at 4:00 am on Memorial Day morning contemplating the state we, as a country, find ourselves in. By the time this blog is published, the American death-toll due to the COVID-19 health crisis will have surpassed 100,000 people. 

Just as the deaths due to COVID-19 seem to have no end in sight, the same can be said about police involved and police related shootings, abuses of authority, and actions taken under the assumption of white privilege that have impacted, ravaged and traumatized black and brown communities across this nation.

During the time of COVID-19:

• In Brunswick GA, while jogging in his neighborhood, a young black man was stopped and fatally shot by a retired police officer/district attorney’s office investigator.
• In Louisville, KY, an African American woman was shot eight times, while asleep, by the police executing an arrest warrant in the middle of the night. The deceased was an EMT.  Her offense: None.  The police had the wrong address.
• In Chicago IL, police officers are under investigation for shooting a young African American male in the subway system. His offense: jumping between train cars.
• In Pender County, NC, a group of armed white men, led by sheriff’s deputy (who was outside of his jurisdiction), broke into and entered the home of an African American mother and her 18-year-old son.  Their offense: None.  Mistaken identity.
• In Miami, FL a black physician in front of his residence and family is handcuffed by a police officer.  His offense: Loading tents in his van to give to the homeless and responding to the pandemic.
• In Wood River, IL, two young black adult males were observed being escorted out of Walmart store under the watchful eyes of a police officer grimacing, gripping his weapon and holster.  Their offense: refusal to remove their facemasks during the COVID-19 pandemic.

Rather than focus on these outrageous actions and inflicted horrors tolerated and condoned by the silence of the dominant group,  I have chosen to focus on the behaviors behind inaction by black and brown people who continue to experience violence while a nationwide pandemic unfolds. 

Watching the Sleight of Hand Trick & The Puppeteer

In this writing, I will avoid diving deeply into the “sleight of hand” trickery being played out by the dominant group acting against communities of color but, it must be addressed in order to understand why these communities, who consistently experience unspeakable violence, have remained quiet in the face of the acts listed above.

Government leaders, many of whom are members of the dominant group, give press conferences and release statements that are filled with language they think the impacted communities want to hear. They try to appease the people; they create the illusion that, this time, steps are being taken to prosecute those involved and prevent other incidents from happening in the future, when in all actuality, they are doing this in hopes of containing the reaction of the impacted community long enough for the all too short communal memory to kick in and these victims names are lost to history. For a bonfire to burn out, simply don’t feed it any logs.  Just stand by in silence, and watch the flames flicker down and burn out, then wait until life returns to normal.

Common Thread-Watching the Bonfire

With these types of incidents, there is a common series of actions that occur once they are brought to light. Black and brown communities:

• Express public outrage through demonstrations, marches and, protests
• Put pressure on public officials for statements of condemnation
• Demand public investigations, both state and federal
• Demand disciplinary actions, terminations, arrests
• Call for criminal trials leading to incarnations
• File civil lawsuits against local municipalities resulting in either depositions, legal settlements, or long, enduring, court room trials that are covered in social media

Although the writing will be centered on the tragedy of Brunswick GA, in which a black life was tragically taken, this is my story.  

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My Dear Readers,

Recently in a LinkedIn posting, I reviewed an article in which two black men working as subcontractors for FedEx in Georgia, were fired for posting a video on social media showing a customer racially abusing them.  Among the comments, one stated:

“Good thing they weren’t jogging lol.”

The comment was “liked” by two others as well as viewed by seven including me. Initially I was struck by the insensitivity, understanding that another young black life had been lost not too far from where the racially abusive actions had occurred.

I responded to the individual with the following (the name has been changed to protect their identity):  

“Robert, a family is grieving, and black and brown people are traumatized.  Parents are fearful of seeing their children for the last time as they go out and engage in activities.  Empathy and compassion are warranted and appreciated.  Please do better.  Be heartfelt, not heartless.”

I received the following from “Robert”:

“That wasn’t supposed to be funny, that was a serious statement.  But you work with the cops, so I don’t expect you to understand.  Please do better!!”

Initially, I was disturbed by the young man rudeness and sarcasm.  After clarifying my work responsibilities as well as explaining that I do not work for the police, I stated:

“It may be a generational issue however, upon reading your comment, I was unable, especially with the ‘lol’, to understand that you were making a serious statement. It may be that your statement is more of a reenactment of the “survival mentality” that African Americans have become accustomed to utilizing when feeling hopeless following a repeat of traumas that are forced upon our community. I do take seriously your comment, ‘Please do better.’ I will seek to do better as I will be writing a blog posting on LinkedIn in which among other feedback, I will feature the psychological impacts of your ‘Good thing they weren’t jogging lol’, comment. I will of course notify you when the blog is posted. I would be most interested in your feedback. Thank you for sharing.”

Keeping in mind a fellow writer on LinkedIn, Curtiss, who stated, in not so many words, “every experience ain’t about you”, I have taken a moment to breathe and use one of my own clinical models.

The Five R’s of RELIEF

In my clinical practice I have taught my patients the clinical model of the Five R’s of RELIEF:  Respite, Reaction, Reflection, Response and Reevaluation, which encourages proactive strategies and actions.  Looking at the situation through this lens, I began to realize that there was some truth in the young black man’s sarcastic retort of “Please do better!!”.

I was able to realize that if I responded defensively or in kind to the statement, that I would be furthering the sleight of hand trick being played by the “puppeteer”, the dominant group, and the “audience”, members of the marginalized group that maintain the status quo, would be focused on the argument between myself and the young man and not on the life tragically lost “jogging while black”.

The “I” Factor: I heard you…. But are you listening?

In the end, whatever message I sought to communicate would have been minimized by being only heard and lost because it was not listened to and understood. What is the difference? Simple.

When only hearing, words enter one ear and exit through the other.  Listening, using the following elements of my clinical model “The “I” Factor”, requires information, involvement, integration, implementation, and impact to lead to understanding.

So, with the focus on listening, I say that the comment of the young man with the initial reaction of laughter and the sarcastic retort of “Please do better” is not the main issue. It’s rather an outlying issue of how we treat or view each other within the African American community. 

Pointing the Finger… Black Silence

And what about “black silence”?

In response to the LinkedIn comment, “Good thing they weren’t jogging, lol” two individuals showed their support by “liking” Robert’s statements and another four individuals contributed their own comments to the main article. Yet none, other than I, responded to Robert’s words. There is no evidence that more than seven individuals even saw the article. 

But what if other African Americans saw Robert’s words. And, what if, after doing so, they simply chose to dismiss, ignore, and not respond?

Simply asking “Why did they choose to be silent?” is circular and we learn nothing from it.

The real question is…What is the foundation of the fear response causing the dismiss, ignore and be silent behavior?

Three answers:

• Survival
• Resilience
• Lacking in post-traumatic growth  

Survival Mentality: “Good thing they weren’t jogging, lol”

Robert’s flippant response following the tragic killing of one of his community paired with his adamant claim that it was a serious, not sarcastic, statement shows that he may be living in fear. This could be an example of how black people respond to these violent events.

The response can also be an example of his survival mentality (believing that you are willing to do whatever it takes to survive), that was passed down to him inter-generationally from his parents, grandparents, and great grandparents and taught to him by his church, his school, and his community to use humor to dull the pain of repeated trauma.  

With that survival mentality, it allows you to see the fact that they weren’t killed as a victory and not as a symptom of the underlying malaise of race relations in America.

 The use by the dominant group of law enforcement as a weapon, individuals professing the right to stop and interrogate blacks and simply white privilege is not new.

Resilience: The Art of Surviving to Thriving

The western origin of the definition of resilience is a person’s mental ability to recover quickly from misfortune, illness, or depression.  Therefore, resilient people develop a mental capacity that allows them to adapt with ease during adversity. Bending rather than breaking under pressure.

The assumption is that the resilient person is strong, and that strength gives a person the ability to overcome. The dominant group has placed the African American individual on the pedestal of being resilient and therefor able to withstand any number of abuses and traumas.

 In return, African Americans have internalized the belief of resilience regarding their ability to survive actions of racism, oppression and discriminatory treatment in hopes of one day reaching identifiable symbols of success in order to try to exert control over the incidents of violence and oppression.  

Existing, Surviving, Driving, Striving & Thriving- The Illusions vs. the Truth

The African American community consistently fails to recognize the “sleight of hand” trick being played by the dominant group. The path, as I developed in the Five Stages of the Journey of Self Discovery, which begins at existing, is omitted by the dominant group.

 The focus by the dominant group is intentionally placed on surviving to thriving.  Thriving will consistently be denied to you because the stages of driving (empowerment) and striving (direction and pacing) are omitted. 

Furthermore, to keep the game in play, a few “chosen ones” are permitted to sit along with the dominant group however, they will never be fully accepted.  This is the “carrot” that is auspiciously dangled in order to maintain the imbalance of power between the African American community and the dominant group.

Post Traumatic Growth-Balancing & Not Overcoming Traumatic Impacts

African Americans daily face 12 forms of racism and 14 subtypes of trauma.  Although it is known that our children will continue to face regular acts or incidents that will be so traumatic and impactful that they would be carried over into adulthood, we still do not create measures to assist them to balance these traumas.  Rather, the focus is overcoming traumatic impacts through the falsehood of resilience (strength), and silence (shaming).

African Americans residing outside the land from which they originate are the wealthiest, the most educated and hold more homeownership and socio-economic status than other Africans.

Despite these accomplishments, African Americans continue to maintain a survival mentality, live in fear, and act in ways that are reactive and not proactive.

Concluding Words-Dr. Kane

The bonfire created by the tragic killing in Brunswick, GA will eventually burn out. The history of African American action is one of inaction such as waiting for someone, some Black Messiah to come along and lead our people to freedom. 

Yes, there have been such individuals like, Harriet Tubman, Frederick Douglass, Marcus Garvey Shirley Chisholm, Martin Luther King, Jr., and Malcolm X to name a few.  Yes, celebrities will lend their names and statuses and preachers and politicians will use this tragedy as a pulpit to keep their names alive.  Yet what will transform?  How will we transform? 

Who will be the next black person to die?

Will he or she be your child or mine?  Will she be in her home asleep only to die in a hail of bullets due to a mistaken address?  Or will he be jogging, walking or just sitting in his car in his neighborhood, one in which others have determined that he does not belong.

Dear Robert,

I want to thank you for sharing your comments.  You are right.  We must all… do better.  You have an opportunity to do so. Instead of defending, focus on the ABCs: achieving, believing and conceiving. Please do better.

Best regards, your elder, 

Dr. Micheal Kane

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Honoring Our Heroes on Memorial Day

LT. Colonel Lemuel Penn

Lemuel Penn joined the Army Reserve from Howard University.  He served in World War II in New Guinea and the Philippines earning a Bronze Star with Valor.  Penn, father of three, was 48 years old at the time he was murdered by Klansmen.

The two Klansmen were tried in state superior court but were found not guilty by an all-white jury.  They were later found guilty of the lesser charge of “violation of civil rights” and received minimum sentences.

The 6888th Central Postal Directory Battalion

Led by its black female commander, Major Charity Adams Earley, it was the only all-female, African American battalion serving overseas in France during World War II.

At the time, there were more than seven million American troops stationed in Europe. The task of sorting and delivering mail was difficult due to common names, soldiers on secret assignments and wartime conditions. At the time, there were more than seven million American troops stationed in Europe and receiving letters from home was an important way to keep up the morale of the troops on the front lines.

These enlisted women worked eight-hour shifts, seven days a week, despite having to respond to racism and segregation while performing their duties.

Major Earley felt that reacting to racism caused more problems than it solved and insisted that the 6888th Battalion look past the prejudice directed at them by the men retuning from the frontlines. Major Earley’s efforts lead to a US recruitment tour to encourage more women to enlist and were instrumental in easing the inclusion of African Americans and women into military service.

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“Those who try to hold on to their world views following trauma are often more fragile, defensive and easily hurt.  Their wounded assumptions are at risked of being shattered again and again.“

-Stephen Joseph (2011)

Until the next time,

Remaining … in Our Corner

In Our Corner: Self Hate and Pressure for Acceptance

“We’re men. Soldiers. And I don’t intend for our race to be cheated of its place of honor and respect in this war because of fools like C.J.”
– MSgt. Vernon Waters (character), A Soldier’s Play

 

“Remember, you’re the first colored officer most of these men ever seen. The Army expects you to set an example for the colored troops… and be a credit to your race.”
– Col. Nivens (character), A Soldier’s Play

 

“Any man ain’t sure where he belong, gotta’ be in a whole lotta pain.”
– CJ (character), A Soldier’s Play

 

My Dear Readers,

My, oh my…what a beginning for 2020! I recently returned from a five-thousand-mile, round-trip, journey to New York over a weekend to see the Broadway theater production of A Soldier’s Play. It is a WWII murder mystery story set on a segregated military base in Louisiana.

Following my earlier trip to see Slave Play, I was anticipating a second triumphant return to Seattle having experienced a play of similar brilliance but, what I experienced was nothing like I expected.

In Slave Play, I marveled at the playwright’s utilization of race, sex and trauma to shine a light on our society’s relationship with white supremacy, but A Soldier’s Play was different. It was more personal. It told how some African Americans internalized white supremacy then weaponized against one another. The pure self-hate and internal demand for acceptance being portrayed by a black cast, simply hit too close to home.

On the surface, A Soldier’s Play is about a black man’s desire to fight for his country during WWII. Underneath, there is the picture of the ongoing internal conflict with achieving status and acceptance while struggling with self-hatred and denial of dreams and opportunities.

A Soldier’s Play is invaluable as it seeks to portray the psychological landscapes of these men who struggle to be accepted as equals by whites while battling the internalized oppression and self-hatred that flows from their psychosocial wounds paralleling, with great accuracy, the struggle black men face today.

The play identifies the good, bad and ugly within the main characters Sgt. Waters and Capt. Davenport. Utilizing quotes from the stage play, I will seek to expose common themes and how those themes impact African Americans today.
Sgt. Waters:
Sgt. Waters is an African American holdover from WWI who, due to the military’s segregationist policies of the time, feels denied his place of honor and respect.

For him, WWII presents another opportunity to gain that respect and honor he feels he is due, and he is determined not to be denied his moment of glory and recognition. In the play, Sgt. Waters shares the following story of an experience in France during WWI:

“You know the damage one ignorant Negro can do? We were in France in the first war; we’d won decorations. But the white boys had told all them French gals that we had tails. Then they found this ignorant colored soldier, paid him to tie a tail to his ass and run around half naked, making monkey sounds.

Put him on the big round table in the Café Napoleon, put a reed in his hand, crown on his head, blanket on his shoulders, and made him eat “bananas” in front of all them Frenchies. Oh, the white boys danced that night… passed out leaflets with that boy’s picture on it.

Called him Moonshine, King of the Monkeys. And when we slit his throat, you know that fool asked us what he had done wrong?”

Sgt. Waters’ words and actions are clear indications of what he is willing to do to gain “honor and respect.” Now faced with a new war and thus an opportunity to gain “honor and respect”, Sgt. Waters is driven to oust any person he views stands in his way.

He subsequently targets a colored soldier, CJ. He plants false evidence to have him arrested, telling him

“Whole lot of people just can’t seem to fit in to where things seem to be going. Like you, CJ. See, the Black race can’t afford you no more. There used to be a time, we’d see someone like you singin’, clownin’, yassuh –bossin’… and we wouldn’t do anything. Folks liked that.

You were good. Homey, kind of nigger.

When they needed somebody to mistreat, call a name or two, they paraded you. Reminded them of the good old days. Not no more. The day of the Geechee is gone, boy. And you’re going with it.”

As a result of the stress being placed upon him, CJ commits suicide by hanging himself while being held in the stockade.
Later, Sgt. Waters, drunk and physically beaten, is found fatally shot in full military uniform and casted off on a muddy dirt road in the rain. As he lay dying, he screams at his killer:
“They still … hate you! THEY STILL HATE YOU!!”

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Analysis – Dr. Kane:
It would be a mistake to misjudge Sergeant Waters or depict him as evil. He simply wants the acceptance, honor and respect that has been historically denied to him and those of his race. Sergeant Waters is a deeply conflictive man. His hatred of the white man is only matched with the hatred of other African Americans who due to their ignorant behaviors are preventing his quest for glory.

He therefore takes it upon himself to protect the black race from acts of shame and humiliation. As demonstrated in story of slitting a young man’s throat and creating false evidence resulting in the suicide of another, he shows the extent to which he is willing to go to prevent the race from being “cheated of its place of honor and respect”.

One of Sgt. Waters’ characterizations is shame-based behavior. True to form, in his shame, he is depicted as feeling unworthy, defective and empty. In acting out those feelings, he repeatedly committed acts of racism and inflicted psychological trauma and humiliation on others. Something black men have faced from previous generations to today.

Shame can be debilitating, toxic and extremely destructive. Shame works to separate the individual from the psychological self. It creates an internal crisis that attacks the inner core, triggering a shaming spiral of negative self-talk.

Shame can be defined in several ways:
• A painful emotion caused by a strong sense of guilt, embarrassment, unworthiness or disgrace.
• An act that brings dishonor, disgrace or public condemnation.
• An object of great disappointment.

Another characterization of Sgt. Waters is an extreme fear of humiliation.

Humiliation is the infliction of a profoundly violent psychological act that leaves the victim with a deep wound within the psychological self. The painful experience is vividly remembered for a long time.
This includes:
• The enforced lowering of a person or group, a process of subjugation that either damages or strips away a person’s pride, honor or dignity.
• A state of being placed, against one’s will, in a situation where one is made to feel inferior.
• A process in which the victim is forced into passivity, acted upon, or made to feel helpless.

Humiliation differs from shame in that humiliation is public, whereas shame is private. Humiliation is the suffering of an insult. If the person being humiliated deems the insult as credible, then they will feel shame.

One can insult and humiliate another; but that person will only feel shame if one’s self image is reduced. Such action requires the person who has been humiliated to buy into or agree with the assessment that shame is deserved.

A person who is secure about their own stature is less likely to be vulnerable to feeling shame, whereas the insecure person is more prone to feeling shame because this individual gives more weight to what others think of him than to what he thinks of himself.

In the mind of Sgt. Waters, both individuals CJ the “singin’, clownin’, yassuh –bossin” individual and Moonshine, King of the Monkeys had to die. The humiliation was open and public, and the pain of shame was too much to bear.

It is ironic that in Sgt. Waters’ quest to avoid shame and humiliation, his death was just that, shameful, humiliating and at the hands of those he deemed unworthy.

Upon being caught his killer stated, “I didn’t kill much. Some things need gettin’ rid of. Man like Waters never did nobody no good anyway.”

These words, which may have been spoken 80 years ago, continue to be the sentiment that is being displayed against African Americans today as they continue to be impacted by racism and the resulting psychological trauma.

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Capt. Davenport:
The military hierarchy, under pressure from the African American community and fearful of a possible race riot after the murder of a black soldier where the main suspects are the local Klansmen, sends a black investigator to look into the murder of Sergeant Waters. He is the first “Negro” officer that these men (including whites) have ever seen. He has been given three days to solve the murder. He has no authority and must be accompanied by a white officer when interviewing white witnesses.

Col. Nivens, the white base commander, wants him to quickly complete his assessment and be “in and out” of the military base ASAP. He seeks a quick investigation without finding any conclusions. He states
“The worst thing you can do, in this part of the country, is pay too much attention to the death of a negro under mysterious circumstances.”

In addition to being pressured to tread lightly and not solve the case, he is reminded by Col. Nivens that he is special and different. He is the first of his kind and carrying the responsibility to represent well. Col. Nivens states:
“Remember, you’re the first colored officer most of these men ever seen. The Army expects you to set an example for the colored troops… and be a credit to your race.”

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Analysis –Dr. Kane:
The characterization of Capt. Davenport is a representation of the concept of “The Talented Tenth”. This is a term that was designated a leadership class of African Americans in the early 20th Century.

The term originated in 1886 among Northern white liberals with the goal of establishing black colleges in the South to train black teachers and elites. The term was later publicized by W.E.B. Dubois whose intent was to educate the best minds of the race and disseminate them into the greater black community allowing for the uplifting of the race.

Capt. Davenport’s character is the first Negro officer these people have ever seem. He is viewed as the “top” or ‘crème de la crème” of his race. He is given an impossible task to investigate (quietly) without solving the murder of Sgt. Waters.

He is viewed with suspicion by whites and in awe by blacks. He is given three days to complete the task and is mindful that he must represent both the Army, that enforces segregation and mistreats blacks, and try to deliver justice to the African American community which is waiting hungrily for the results.

The character of Capt. Davenport continues to permeate the psychological self of African Americans today. Following sixty years since the ending of legal segregation, the strategies of the dominant group has also transformed. Although diversity has transformed to add inclusion, equity and social justice, African Americans continue to find themselves impacted by acts of racism and psychological trauma.

Thanks to the scriptwriters in the movie “A Soldier’s Story” and the theatrical production, A Soldier’s Play, both conclude on a “positive note”. The murder is solved, the military hierarchy is happy, and the African American community nationwide can celebrate another small victory.

The African American community is left with a sliver of optimism to hold onto in hopes of a better future.

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Concluding Words-Dr. Kane:
In this fictional story all ends well. The murder has been solved. No race riots. No more national outcry for civil rights investigations. The peace and calm of segregation and psychological traumatization of black soldiers and civilians can one again go back to normal.

In the film conclusion, the scriptwriters offer a slightly different, more accurate portrayal of black-white interpersonal relationships, a tension that exists to this very day: In an exchange between a white officer and Captain Davenport:

Capt. Taylor: I guess I’ll have to get used to Negroes with bars on their shoulders, Davenport. You know, being in charge.

Capt. Davenport: Oh, you’ll get used to it, Captain. You bet your ass on that. You’ll get used to it.

However, what is clearly left open are the questions about the strength of self-hatred and the pressure of acceptance by others that is truly captured in the scripts and holds true for African Americans today. Specifically, CJ referring to Sgt. Waters: “Any man ain’t sure where he belong, gotta’ be in a whole lotta pain.”

It remains to be real in today’s lives of African Americans who can endure, daily, fourteen subtypes of psychological traumas and eleven forms of racism.

The concept of the “talented tenth” was constructive and necessary when developed, but today, is a concept that is ill-suited and destructive because it demands that the individual sacrifice the psychological self on behalf of the impoverished community. Rather than bolster the community, the concept’s success is dependent upon disempowering the psychological self and creates insecurity and detachment and it weakens generation after generation.

What can be done? What can we do to model for our children and future generations? We can…. Walk the Landscape.

What is the Landscape?
The landscape is life.
One of the essential realities of life is that death is a certainty. What remains uncertain is:
• How we live our lives
• What we experience during our lifetimes
• The memories we leave with the individuals we interact with.

Life at the Crossroads
Waiting at the crossroads are possible experiences, submerged materials such as incidents, situations and conflicts that may surface directly in one’s path. Such materials demand to be addressed.

Interaction Points
These crossroads are interactions points where barriers, challenges, experiences with difficult individuals and opportunities are presented. At the crossroads:
• Choices are presented
• Decisions are made and directions are chosen
• Consequences for choices and decisions are foreseen.
• Wisdom is gained, lessons are learned, and both are utilized for future experiences
• Transformation through Self-Empowerment is achieved

The Journey of Self-Discovery is actualized upon understanding that:
• All decisions have consequences
• The fullness of life is measured not just by one’s success but by failures as well.

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“We cannot think of unity with others until we have first united among ourselves. We cannot think of being acceptable to others until we have proven acceptable to ourselves.”
– Malcolm X

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“Be willing to walk alone. Many who started with you won’t finish with you.”
– Shaniqua King

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“Truth…it’s about Walking the Landscape and in walking, one simply exposes one’s truth.”
– Dr. Micheal Kane

Until the next time,
Remaining … in Our Corner

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